Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Happiness is a State of Mind

I have heard it said if you don't mind it don't matter.  I think this is true of everything in life.  Happiness like Sadness is a state of mind. Some people choose to dwell in that dark place where everything is sad or depressing or saps their mental and emotional energy.  Happiness is a choice.

We all have things that make us sad, or angry, or even depressed.  We lose friends, we lose jobs, we lose family members, and we lose homes. We lose things that are important to us but I have seen those who are living on the street alone with nothing to their name that they cannot carry that have found a way to be happy.

They may be living out of a shopping cart but they celebrate every victory and for them waking up is a victory.  They know a secret to happiness that many long to understand. That material possessions do not make you happy. There is no guarantee in life,  there is no rule that says if you get that promotion you have been working for you will finally be happy.  If you find that perfect mate you will be happy.  If you hit the lottery you will be happy. These are material things and material things can be taken away.

That spouse can stop loving you or die or leave.  That job can be lost or cease to exist, that money from the lottery if not well invested can be lost or given away or spent. These are temporary things, they do not last nor will the happiness they bring to your life.  Happiness is a state of mind.

I have known many people who have the least amount of material possessions that are blissfully happy, why I have often asked are they so happy when those I know with the most are unhappy ones.  The ones with so much more often long for that next bigger better deal.  They work day in and day out to achieve this ideal of what makes them happy.  The surrender themselves in pursuit of an ideal that does not exist in reality.

They strive to reach a place of true happiness through ownership of possessions instead of taking that long hard look within themselves and find that level of tranquility that is not bought but is earned.  Now I am not saying immediately go out and give up all your worldly possessions.  Or join a monastery and forsake all material possessions. But I am saying look within your own soul and find that which makes you happy and pursue it.

That may be creating something or doing something that makes you happy.  It might be growing as a human being through community involvement or through helping others.  It might even be simply finding the calm happy place in your soul through meditation or Yoga and when life throws you a curve ball being able to go there in your mind and refocus you energy and keep that true happiness from slipping away.

There are many ways to find happiness, there as as many ways as there are people who are pursuing it. Talk to those who have found true happiness and find out what path they took to get there. Some of the methods they used may help you find your own, they may not, but if you don't seek happiness you will never find it.

When we are children we are delighted with the simplest joys in life.  We often times receive gifts that are elaborate and expensive but find ourselves playing with the cardboard box the gift came in because it is colorful and alights our imagination and becomes a castle or a spaceship or a refrigerator if we enjoy playing cook.  Life isn't about having the best of everything, it about making the most of what we have.

I want everyone today to think back to when they were children and those moments of awe and wonder at how incredible our universe is.  Take a moment today or this week to just stop and smell the roses.  If you live in an area that roses aren't available wander past a bakery and just stop to inhale the divine scents drifting out of the fresh baked goods coming out of the oven.  Stop and star up at the stars and try to count them, you will quickly realize that in the bigger scheme of things you are only a microscopic dust particle floating through the air and that no matter what you may achieve in your career and your life someone will come along in a few years and blow those records out of the water.

We cannot find happiness in owning the biggest house, or driving the fastest newest car, or even marrying the most beautiful, intelligent, amazing person.  Because in the end those things really don't matter and the happiness they bring into our lives is fleeting when that house burns to the ground or is lost in a natural disaster with all those material possessions inside, or that car is a few years old and scratched and dented and no longer the fastest thing on the road.  Or we wake up one day and realize that the perfect spouse is human and has flaws we choose not to see in the beginning.  Then suddenly you are in search of the next big thing to bring you happiness.

Instead of searching for something that doesn't exist. Instead of trying to find a temporary happiness in a place true happiness doesn't exist.  True happiness exist in your soul.  It is the things we all have in our lives or should have in our lives that help us grow and evolve into the people we born to be.  It that state of nirvana where no matter what goes wrong we escape to and find ourselves.

Take this journey with me to find that inner strength that fuels your own fire. Find yourself in the process and discover what it takes to be truly happy.  Find out what makes you personally happy be that a hobby, a passion, or even just a  new life skill.  Find out what gives you that one thing that nothing else on this planet can.

Life is filled with potholes, things that shake us to the very core and make us realize that not everything is going to last and that every day will bring with it new challenges and new goals.  What may make us happy today may make us sad tomorrow. As humans we are ever changing every growing and ever needing to finding new and exciting ways to stir that inner goddess in us all.

Some people find their true happiness in giving of themselves, in act and thought.  If that is your true happiness find a way to channel that energy into constructive ways to make that happen.  Some people find their true happiness in creating, be that writing, photography, painting, music, or even sculpture.  Then go do that, take a class, hone that skill make things that make you happy and help you express that inner creative genius. 

This journey is not for the weak of heart. It is not for those unwilling to actually face those inner demons you find along the way.  You may find yourself facing things that you thought had already run their course and were long gone. During this discovery process you may learn that things you had already put behind you rear their ugly heads for you to finally once and for all really put to rest.  We can bury our past but we cannot run from it. It will linger in those dark corners of our heart until we finally put them down and walk away from them to never return again. And then at the worst moment they rear their ugly heads again in a new situation and a new life we have created.  But if we face those fears and problems head on and deal with them. Allowing our hearts and minds to process the information then we can honestly say that those things are no longer an issue for us.  This might include jealousy, or a fear of being alone, or even a fear of disappointing those we love.

Embrace your flaws, we all have them.  If you have always had body images take a long hard look at yourself in the mirror.  You body will change with time and age.  The things that you hate right now in 20 or 30 years won't really matter.  It won't be in the same place it won't look or feel the same and worst case scenario if you really hate it that much change it.  Do what you need to do to make yourself happy.  Find that happiness and surround yourself with the things that make you happy.  Search inside yourself for what brings you the most happiness today, right this minute.  If it changes then evolve with it, change and adapt to keep that true happiness.

If doing something makes you happy today but a year from now no longer stirs those happiness feelings let it go.  If it no longer works for you it is the universes way of saying it is time to move on and to try something new.  If you find that walking away from it helps and returning to it later helps do it.

In my lifetime I have had many things that made me happy, and for some reason or another I lost my way to that place. I have simply walked away and revisited that place at another time in the future. Photography made me very happy but I got bored with it and walked away from it.  I am now finding my way back to it.  Not because I have run out of other things that make me happy but I want to re-explore this part of my self and see if I can find the same happiness in that activity that I once did.

Some true happiness survive a lifetime, some are passing fancies.  Much like the people in our lives we outgrow or surpass the things that make us happy.  Since we are ever changing and evolving sometimes we need to find new things to excite us and sometimes we just need to take a break from the things we once enjoyed so much. Take a vacation of sorts from the things that no longer work for you.  If you have always enjoyed painting but are burned out from it walk away. Take a huge box and put those art supplies away in storage. You don't have to get rid of it but sometimes you do need to take a break.  In 6 months or a year revisit that place in your life.  Are you ready to once again pick up that paint brush and paint with your whole heart, if not consider getting rid of it. Many times things don't wait for us to get back around to them.  If we take a break from people they often move forward in their lives and create lives that don't include you.  In painting, paints can go bad with time so it is best to release those things back into the universe so that others who need them in their lives right now can take advantage of things we no longer need to make us happy.

Well I hope my words today have given all some food for thought.  Some things to consider along their own personal path of finding themselves and their true happiness.  I hope that this stirs those feelings in your soul for the things that bring you joy and help you remember that the only person who can truly make you miserable or make you blissfully happy is yourself.  You cannot control the actions of others, but you can control your reactions to those actions and how much you allow them to define you is up to you.

I found this website I wanted to share regarding some tips for finding that true happiness.  I hope it helps others get some ideas for ways to make their happiness a reality.  I hope it stirs within your belly the desire to be happy and to pursue what makes you happy. Where there is a will there is a way. Many times people say I cannot afford to be happy.  Being sad or depressed can take a toll as well both mentally and physically.  Can you really afford not to be happy?  Can you truly spare another year, another day, or even another moment living a life that isn't true or real to your soul?

Being Happy and finding your Bliss

If you cannot afford to purchase the things the items needed to pursue your dreams ask around, check out free sites that often give things away to those who act quickly.  Get creative, ask friends, and family members for gifts that will further your dreams of happiness instead of the things you don't want or don't need.  Save your pennies until you can afford with that higher goal in mind.

If you want something bad enough you will find a way, if you don't you will eventually get bored and move on with your life.  I hope all who are reading my blogs are well and pursing their own happiness.  I want to thank everyone who has read my blog, shared my blog or discussed my blog with others. You are the reason I am reaching my dreams and goals.  I hope that the tips I have shared today help you find that true happiness we all long for and that they help you get one step closer to finding the real you.

Until Tomorrow blog buddies, be safe, be sane and be happy.

This crossed my desk a few days ago and wanted to share it with you I am including a link to the site this was found on as well for those who want to take a closer look or just examine this further.



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