Monday, April 29, 2013

When your bliss takes you to new places

Today has been a very up and down day.  A friends father died a few weeks ago and today the family asked me to do video and photographs of his memorial service. That was very sad but at the same time I was honored that they asked me to record this moment in their lives.  I did my absolute best with my new camera and even with a few glitches to the process think the end result turned out really well.  I put a lot of time and energy and effort into making this very sad event something they could look back on and hopefully remember with some degree of happiness.

Part 1 of his memorial service
Part 2 of his memorial service
Part 3 of his memorial service

They got to see a lot of family from far away and I learned a little something about myself in the process.  I also got to play with my new video and photography software and master some new skills.  This week I have had off from class and have tried to use my time wisely. 

I have been working in my growing garden, even after several setbacks due to the odd weather we are having this spring in TN.  I have lost many of my plants and had to replant due to unseasonably late frost in our area.  We had a tornado sweep through our area yesterday but I am happy to report my new greenhouse actually was left undamaged by the high winds.

I have done my first lunar shots in the last week and learned even more about photography first hand.  I think they turned out pretty well for a novice with basic equipment. But am already daydreaming of more powerful lenses and better shots in my future.  I have entered my first photo contest and lost and entered my second with high hopes.  At this point I am only doing this for personal satisfaction and my own bliss.  But am finding myself intrigued by the whole DSLR camera and all the bells and whistles that go with it.


Please stop by and like your favorite in this competition, this link will take you to the photo of my read headed canine companion.


I am learning how to do videography, which I really didn't anticipate and am also getting better and better shots. Now I look at my old photos and go really, I shared that publicly.  I think the better camera and better pictures has made me more judgmental of my past skills.  But at least I know I am improving and learning along the way.

I have not only created a website for my photography but also a facebook fan site.
Jennifer Akes Photography on Facebook
Jennifer Akes Photography website

And I have even shared some of my photos on the Pintrest site
Jennifer Akes on Pinterest

I feel like this passion is beginning to help the pieces fall together.  Because I am no longer focusing on what is wrong in my life I have found other aspects of my life beginning to fall into place.  I spoke with someone regarding a job once my bachelors degree is completed, and have a renewed sense of hope regarding my funding.  I have also begun a cooperative in our area for those who are interested in sharing their surplus or possibly making some additional funds for their household selling their organically raised and humanely harvested foods.

It has been a very busy week but as the weekend slowly comes to a close I am thankful for all the blessings it has brought into my life.  I am sad at the loss of a wonderful man but glad that my photos and my videos could bring them some joy in their time of sadness.  I am overjoyed at my growing confidence in these new arenas and wonder what lies ahead.

I know that as each new challenge shows itself in my life I will once again rise to the challenge and hopefully not only learn more about myself but also about my own happiness through them.  I am loving my life more and more with each passing cycle of the planet and learning and relearning some important life lessons.

I am even making time in my already crazy busy schedule to escape for a few hours and just spend time with friends. Something I haven't done in a great while but have managed to do twice in the last two weeks.

For those who say following your bliss is a waste of time, I say it is what your time is all about.  We all work hard at jobs that perhaps we wish we didn't have to do. Be that laundry or something you get a paycheck for. My bliss is what keeps my sanity intact and my balance in this world secure. It is something that I can look forward to and hopefully eventually make a larger aspect of my life.

I am growing and evolving into the person I was born to be.  With each new skill and each success I am gaining confidence and I am gaining knowledge.  The knowledge I am gaining may not seam like much to an outsider but to me it is the world.

I hope my words today and my experiences have inspired others to follow their own bliss.  Nothing is impossible if you want it bad enough. Sometimes you just have to decide what is really important to you.  You have to set a goal, figure out what you need to do to make it happen and keep on charging that wind mill until you either reach that goal or beat back those dragons in your head that are telling you that you cannot do it.  Either way enjoy the ride.  Life is way to short to be miserable.

Until next time blog buddies.  Stay safe, stay sane and be happy.


Thursday, April 18, 2013

Releasing your past and embrassing your future

I promised myself to write when there were major changes in my life either physical or emotional.  Today I am going through a major emotional change.  I am learning to let go.  To make room in my life for good things by releasing something that no longer works or makes me happy.  This year is all about growth, about becoming the person I was born to be.

It is a year of growth and new beginnings.  I realized that I have entirely to much emotional attachment to a few material things in my life that although they no longer serve any purpose in my day to day existence they are preventing me from growing and changing because I am still existing in the past through their presence in my life.

I know that some emotional attachment is good, it binds us to the real world and reminds us why we struggle from day to day just to keep a roof over our head and clothes on our back.  But an unrealistic and unhealthy attachment to material possessions can also bind you to a world that no longer exist in your here and now.

Many times we get to attached to things that remind us of a simpler time or happier times with those we love. A favorite shirt or a pair of comfortable shoes.  Using that item to keep those memories alive in our hearts and minds. When it reality those memories would exist even if that material presence was gone.  We should embrace the people we love, not the things that keep those memories foremost in my minds.

As I sat a few days ago going through some old photos I relived those happy memories.  Regretting the loss of many of my photos when my hard drive crashed 2 years ago but also realizing that although those pictures are lost to me, I will always have those memories.  Nothing can take those away memory short of death or memory loss.

My dad always said the part about growing older he never fully understood until he began the process our bodies shut down slowly. First our eyesight isn't what it once was, then our hearing begins to slip and then our memories begin to fade.  He always felt the loss of memories was the greatest loss of all of his possessions. Perhaps that is why I journal so much. So no matter what I can read what I was facing and how I dealt with it.

So today I am facing a demon I have run from in the past in order to make room in my life for the things that will bring me joy and releasing those things that no longer do. Sometimes material things can become a weight around our neck weighing us down and preventing us from growing and changing.  Allowing those things to prevent our growth as people only serves as a disservice to ourselves and those we love. Change isn't easy but is a necessary evil for growth.

So embrace the pain that may come with change. Allow it flow through you and change you. Learn from it and move forward. Don't allow your heart to become so hardened that nothing bothers you or affects you.  But do not dwell in that dark place. Do not allow the pain to make you unfeeling to others or yourself.  What we cannot go around we must go through in order to evolve.

For many years my image of myself has been a phoenix.  From the ashes of its own destruction comes the new bird, ready for flight and ready to live another 1,000 years in glory.  It is often from the ashes of our current life we discover our own future and the path we are born to be upon.  Instead of dwelling in the failures of your life, you should look to the horizon and the better tomorrow just around the corner. 

So today my blog is about growth, changes in our lives that we must make in order to evolve into that phoenix.  Beautiful and renewed and ready to face whatever challenges that may come.  Instead of limiting ourselves to our past, we need to be prepared to do what must be done. To cut ties that bind and to ready our hearts and minds for the bliss that a life well lived promises us. 

Be good to yourself and do not make any changes until you are ready emotionally and mentally for.  Take your time and be patient with yourself but also do not limit your future by the presence of your past.  Learn from your past mistakes and hopefully become a more well rounded and loving person for the life lessons you have faced and survived.  What doesn't kill you will make  you stronger and wiser.

Until next time blog buddies, be safe, stay sane, and follow your bliss.

An interesting article about the phoenix and rising from the ashes of your current existance in order to follow a more harmonious existance. 
http://aflourishinglife.com/2011/01/coping-with-challenging-life-circumstances/




Thursday, April 11, 2013

Blissful journeys of self discovery

I have been trying to balance my extremely busy educational life with my family life and my work life along with following my bliss.  At times I often feel as though one or the other is suffering from having to share so much of my attention and so little of my time. I am still learning to balance out what I can do, and what I want to do, and what is actually going to get done.

I am staying current in my class but I often find myself having to stay up late or get up earlier in order to get my assignments completed and turned in before my deadlines.  I do what I can as I can taking time off from work as needed but then feel this overwhelming guilt that I am not getting as much accomplished as I would like to due to my time constraints.

It is spring finally in Tennessee.  Which means I am running around like a chicken with its head cut off trying to make sure all the plants I have cared for and watched over during the winter months have what they need and are getting the nutrients and water they need to survive and thrive, which is rather stressful but a necessary evil for raising your own plants. Although the weather has finally broken and I can finally get them into their containers and allow Mother Nature to start helping out.  She can at least water them and by providing the best soil possible they can feed themselves and grow into the plants I have dreamed of.

My house is not getting cleaned as often as I would like but only because on my list of priorities it ranks rather low.  I get it done just not every week and often times when I am expecting company or the dog hair and dander start to cause me health issues.  But this is not something I am stressing over or something that I am losing sleep over.  I have always felt a tidy home is a sign of a lack of interest.  No offense to those who are obsessed with keeping a spotless home, but since mine serves many purposes and I live with a man who dusting is a dirty word.  (In other words I don't enter his man zone area) I often feel like I am trying to wash my car in the rain.

I am playing with my new camera and digital darkroom every chance I get, often making small breaks in my day to capture a beautiful butterfly on film or just taking shots of my amazing surroundings to capture that particular sunny day or incredible site.  I am also learning about all the different ways to utilize my gadget and mastering the art of digital darkroom usage. 








I am also working towards my accreditation with my collegian honor society.  In hopes of furthering my goals of becoming a well employed bookkeeping or accounting professional.  Working towards cleaning up my online presence as well as creating my professional portfolio and updating my networking skills in order to have a foot in the door with the right folks after graduation.  It is a very busy year in my life and one that is going by way to fast.

I have created a website for my photography.  I am enjoying it so much I don't want to miss a single opportunity to grow and learn and hopefully take additional photos to add to my growing collection.  I have had a lot of positive feedback for the photos I have shared and look forward to more recognition for this hobby that brings me so much joy. If you would like to check out my new website for it I will post a link in this blog.

My New Photography Portfolio

Today I watched an incredible speaker with my Honor society, it was by Peter Bregman he is the author of a book entitled 18 minute Find your Focus it is about doing what you are passionate about and following your bliss in business. How many of us get bogged down in the details of living and forget how to live.  How we need to prioritize what is truly important to us so those things get done and if we are going against the grain we will never succeed.

So many things in my life right now are pointing me in a new direction with my life.  I really thought when I began this journey that I had it all pretty much figured out.  Little did I realize that sometimes about the time you think you have found your niche something happens that shakes your world to the core and makes you take a long hard look at what you really want or what would truly make you happy.

I am unsure if this has happened because I am for the first time in my life actually stopping and taking the time to examine my own happiness and what I need to do in order to find my bliss. Or if this is happening because I opened the door to my bliss and decided that I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.  Since my fathers death I have been making some pretty major changes in my life that have been snowballing.  First it was eliminating commercial skin products from  my life. Figured I would start small and go from there. Then it was the food we were eating and the things we were putting into our bodies.

I lost my dad to a rare form of cancer and my eyes were opened to the fact that toxins are all around us but most people either don't want to see or refuse to acknowledge their presence.  And now I am taking the huge leap to stop smoking. That has been a long time battle for me and they say you don't truly stop until you are ready to make the change. I am ready to make the change.  I am getting wiser and healthier with each passing day.

No I am not going to turn this blog into a statement about how our foods are killing our nation. This blog is about my bliss and how my live is evolving into what I really want out of life.  I was simply bringing you up to speed on how things are progressing and the changes being made in my real life. 

I am writing this blog not only to share my journey with others but also to keep a record of my journey for looking back at later.  To better gauge how I was successful and where I failed in my attempts to create the life I want to live.  I am finding myself reading more these days, on a very wide variety of subjects I never would have thought about reading before as well as revisiting many of my old favorites.

I am also learning about my own limitations and strengths.  I am learning ways to overcome what I see as my weaknesses and how to encourage my strengths to compensate for those weaknesses.  It has been an interesting journey to say the least and I can honestly say I am the better for having begun it.

I am not really sure where this blog was headed, I just felt the need to do some writing. Maybe the rainy weather has made me want to escape into my mind since I cannot escape into my garden and yard.  I am unsure but hopefully reading about my journey and the progress and rather unexpected turns and twist it is taking will encourage others to begin their own. You never know where a path will lead until you begin to follow it.  Pursing my own personal bliss has left me feeling a little bit overwhelmed from time to time but at the same time I am filled with a renewed sense of hope and happiness.  It has given me an outlet for my creative nature while helping me keep my feet firmly planted in Mother Earth.  It has given me a chance to grow and stretch and try my wings in a wide variety of things that before my journey began I was unsure would be a good fit for me.

I hope that your journey does the same thing. That is opens a world of possibilities that may as close as your own front yard.  That is motivates others to find what makes them happy and pursue those things and who knows along the way you just might learn something about yourself and your world at large.

Until next time blog buddies. Stay safe, stay sane and be happy.