Sometimes the things that bring you joy can also bring frustration

Sometimes the things we want in life just are beyond our reach. We can sense them in our reality but are not quiet getting what we want.  Sometimes we struggle and fight and do everything by the book only to discover that we are penny short or a day late for that missed golden opportunity.  This is normal when following your bliss.

Don't give up and don't give in, just take two steps back and regroup and refocus your energy on what you want and what you need to make you happy.  Sometimes things fall into place when we least expect them and other times it feels like an all up hill journey.

Just because something doesn't happen the way you expect it to or when you expect it doesn't mean it won't eventually come to pass.  I have been saving for a new camera.  I did hours upon hours of research. I weighted the pros and cons of each camera scouring over sales papers, reading up on the latest technology, watching video after video of actual usage of the cameras in question.

I made list after list of the things I wanted my dream camera to do and what I could live without.  I watched sales list and spoke with different people regarding when they thought they would go on sale and when they would be available for purchase and still no camera in my hands.

Due to some unforeseen expenses within my household I have had to dip into the funds I have been setting aside each month to purchase my dream camera.  Pushing it back further and further until it once again feels so incredibly far out of my reach.  But I also know that at times making your dreams a reality aren't easy.  Things happen that postpone the thing we want the most.  Unforeseen expenses drain our funds or unexpected events sap our time and energy.

It doesn't mean I am giving up on my dream camera, it actually makes me work harder towards that end goal. It can be very frustrating to have been within 100 dollars of actually having enough to purchase it and now am almost back to square one, but I also know when I am holding it in my hand free and clear with no chance for owing on what I want it will all be worth the wait.

Sometimes the things we want most on this planet seem to keep one step ahead of us.  They tease and taunt us with their mere existence until some days it only seems like a nice dream we had.  But don't give up.  All is not lost simply because your bliss may be harder to reach than other goals and dreams you have  had in the past.  It just means you will appreciate them more for the struggles you had to face in order to accomplish them.

I am still waiting and watching. Planning the day when I can afford once again to make my major purchase, but I am also a realist and I realize that purchasing a new tire for a vehicle, or emergency dental work for my husband, or even a new stove has to take priority in my life and that although my dreams are important that day to day things must take priority in my finances and in my life.

I know that sometimes it sucks when you have to be a grownup and you have to pay bills before you can buy the things that you want or that will bring you happiness. But such is the nature of the beast and is a fact of life.  Sometimes you just want to say forget it and do what you want to do but you must be a realist and you must know that although it would be great to do that there will be repercussions for your actions. If I don't take care of the things I must take care of before my camera then the long term consequences could far outweigh any happiness I will get from my purchase.

My husband tries to be supportive and and I am sure my crabbiness of late hasn't been easy on our marriage but I am lucky in the fact he understands why I am disappointed and why my mood of late has been a little on the sour puss side.  Sometimes those closest to us end up bearing the wrath of our disappointments.  I am trying hard to count my blessings and know that with time I will make this a reality but sometimes it just isn't easy being patient or an adult.

I guess what I want to share in this blog is that is ok to be disappointed, and it ok to sometimes get frustrated by the things we want being just out our grasp.  It is human nature to desire something you cannot have. It is however not right to make others pay for that disappointment when they have done nothing to create the problem.

I am sorry for allowing my disappointment to affect those around me.  I knew it was wrong but alas I am human and as such I do on occasion make mistakes.  I promised myself when I began writing this blog to not only keep it real but to keep it honest. To show not only the bright side of following your bliss but also the downside to wanting something and not being able to get or do it when you desire it.  I wanted to share this portion of my journey in order to give others hope and let them know it is ok when things don't go exactly the way you plan.  It doesn't mean that it won't happen, it just means it won't happen right now.

As long as you are honest with yourself and those you love you will often find peace in that knowledge.  Allow others in your life into your inner sanctum.  Allow them to know what is going on and why you may not be as happy as you may have been in past days. Don't hide your emotions or your feelings away and try to pretend all is fabulous in your life when it isn't.  We all have bad days, and we all experience disappointment from time to time.  It is the way of life and by trying to pretend all is right with your world when it really isn't only means you aren't being true to yourself.

Just try not to let it flow over into other aspects of your life.  Don't make those who support your dreams and goals and pay the price for your own disappointments.  Let them know that something is going on but it isn't anything they have done or not done, it is just a battle you fighting within yourself.  Who knows by letting others know that deeper aspect of yourself you may just find yourself growing a little wiser about yourself and what is truly important to you in the long run.

I hope my words today has given you some food for thought. I also hope that it helps someone who is struggling with making their dream a reality and who are feeling a little disappointed or frustrated to realize that not everything happens on the schedule you work out. Sometimes it may take longer or come in different ways than you anticipate.  But most of all be honest with yourself, and be honest with those in your life and try to be patient.  I often tell people patience is a virtue and I have never been accused of being a virtuous woman.

Until tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane and try to stay happy.

Weathering the Storms of life and how your Bliss can help you survive Them

As spring finds its way slowly to many parts of our country many gardeners are preparing their soil, planting their seeds with their eyes on the prize of having beautiful abundant healthy foods for their family.  But into every life a little rain must fall. Things that happen that make us take two steps back and ask ourselves, I am doing this why?  I am having one of those days, but thankfully my belief in my bliss is so firmly intact I take these setbacks with a grain of salt and continue on with my journey.

Last night our area was wracked with some very bad storms.  This morning we awoke to the destruction caused by high winds and a lot of rain being dropped on us from the sky often causing damage in the weight of the water sitting on object or the wind dislodging and relocating items that may not have been held down securely enough to prevent their relocation.

As I walked our dogs this morning I surveyed the damage and thought to myself, I am very lucky to be alive and for those closest to me to be as well.  Regardless of the damage incurred I am still thankful for the many blessings in my life and am very thankful for life I am living. This is what following your bliss can do for you during difficult times.  It can give you a firm foundation on which to judge the things that happen that are completely out of your control and that you are unable to change or prevent.

As I walked around looking at the destruction caused by the storm I realized that this is a minor setback to my seasonal garden.  All of my seedlings are safe and sound inside with light and water and heat.  Most of my plants my inner voice told me to rescue and check on, bringing what I could inside and doing what I could to protect from the pending storms.  In Tennessee you are never sure if the weather man is on the money or smoking crack.  So it is always better to plan for the worst, hope for the best and accept whatever life throws at you with grace and dignity.  Knowing in your heart you did what you could to soften the blow but that life will happen according to a plan none of us are privy to.

Because I listened to my inner voice, which I have been honing with following my bliss and being true to myself there is very little setback for the plants in my garden. I literally built walls around them using whatever I could find in the yard that was not already otherwise engaged and moved everything to the center of our polytunnel which now is just a frame, thanks to the storm.  They were fortified using empty buckets that are not currently needed for plants and garbage cans tuned on end to give them bracing.  I did this because the weather man was called for another week of temperature in the 30's and I didn't want to risk losing any more of our plants to the cold.  I had no idea that the weather would turn so nasty that it would shred our cover and leave everything exposed to the weather.

As I searched the yard this morning for our lids to our storage holders for food for our horse and chickens I realized that had I done what I always did we would be literally in a pickle today.  We normally keep an abundance of food on hand for our livestock but due to unexpected expenses I was unable to refill when our supplies when they ran low. For that I am extremely thankful.  Had the polytunnel been filled with hay or the holding tanks filled with feed that would have been money down the drain and wasted because everything is now soaked.

Now I realize most of you are reading this thinking to themselves that I wear rose colored glasses not to see the destruction and the cost that the storm cost us.  But the reality of the situation is this. It could have been far far worse.  We all weathered the storm. There was no loss of life. Our home is intact and standing.  Our barn is no the worse for ware although a little wet this morning.  Our livestock food is wet but can easily be replaced tomorrow and we will struggle through today.  We can feed wet we just cannot feed mildewed feed and hay.  I will scatter what we have give the animals a special day of additional feed and allow my holding tanks to dry out hopefully enough to be refilled tomorrow with fresh grains and I will find a way to store my hay to keep it dry be that a tarp and a skid to keep it off the ground or in our storage building which just recently had several items removed because we gave our surplus furniture to someone who did not have what they needed by way of the basics for their new home.

Everything happens for a reason.  I know at times it may appear that bad things happen to good people for no reason at all.  That the universe is a cosmic joke that just loves to torment you. But often you will find yourself standing on the other side of that storm being very thankful for the many blessings you have in your life.  Even during the darkest times I can usually find something to be thankful for.  I am not an optimist by nature.  I am not a happy person by nature.  In previous years before pursuing my bliss I would have stood in the center of this chaos and though to myself, Now what?  How am I suppossed to rebuild from here.  This is going to cost far more than I can afford and my dreams are at an end because Mother Nature decided to have a fit with my garden.  But not now.

Now I stand in the middle of the chaos and think to myself that the things money cannot buy are still with me.  Those I love made it through the storm safe and sound.  The things that have been destroyed are a pain in the butt to replace but they can be replaced.  That I am healthy, alive, and still kicking.  That is something to be very grateful for.  I have said in the past and many of my friends find humor in the comical way I often describe my life or my circumstance. Blame that on being raised by a very Southern Grandmother and a very patient Father.  But any day this side of the dirt blanket is a good day.  That means any day you open your eyes and manage to struggle your way out of bed is a good day to be alive. Regardless of what turmoil it may bring to your otherwise calm existence.

I promised to blog about what was going on in my life and the path to following my own bliss, in hopes that it gave those who are considering following their own hope as well as the knowledge that they are not alone in this quest. There are many who are waking up to smell the coffee and realizing that their lives are not living but merely existing.  I don't promise you that every day will be sunshine and roses.  But I can promise you if you follow what makes you happy it will help ease the troubled times and give you a far better perspective on what happens in life and how to survive the storms that life often brings.

I hope my blog today has given you all some food for thought.  I hope that is finds many either beginning the journey of finding themselves and their bliss, or at least entertaining the thought of how this change in outlook could have a positive impact on how they see their world and how they react to the things that often times do happen.  I am trying hard to stay true to my purpose for writing this blog. Some days it isn't easy because I cannot think of what to share either because so much happens or nothing at all happens but such is the nature of the beast. Some days it is a buffet and some days it is a famine.  But regardless of what life brings you if you are prepared to handle the worst of it with a smile and the knowledge that ours paths are not set in stone. We are the controlling factor in how they steer us to the next landmark or port.

If you have something to cling to during hard times they don't feel near as hard. Because you know this too shall pass and you will be wiser and stronger for having survived it.  You just have to make sure that the dream you are chasing is yours and not some one else's dream.  You have to live your own life, you have to dream your own dreams and you have to be willing to survive the storms safe in the knowledge that it isn't the end of the world as we know it.

Until tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and be happy.

Be like my seedlings, grow towards the light. Thrive in the container you are planted in and always remember that although you may not know why something is happening, chances are it is meant to strengthen you for road ahead.

We are doing an experiment this year for our garden. Those are recycled toilet paper rolls folded at one end to create growing containers that will break down in soil.  It is our way of cutting our gardening cost and as you can see my seedlings have no issue with the odd containers they are growing in for this year.  It is actually working out really well for us and for the plants we have started for our garden.

Dreary Days of Winter and finding your Bliss

Winter days are often hard to manage through if your bliss in concentrated on things you enjoy during warmer months. Things like swimming and playing tennis is often difficult to do during colder months unless you are lucky enough to belong to a gym who offers indoor heated pools or indoor courts.  But fear not there is a remedy for this problem.

If your bliss involves activities that can only take place during warmer months there are many things you can do during your off season.  We live in TN and although it doesn't get the harsher weather that many states suffer through during the winter months. The weather can often turn unpredictable and ruin otherwise well laid plans.

I have been scrambling for the last few days trying to get as much done as possible outside in preparation for my garden.  I find great joy in raising our own food and are exploring several different things to extend our growing season.  We have had temperatures in the 60's and 70's for the last few days and it has been entirely to pretty to stay cooped up inside so I have been working my raised beds and taking stock of what I have on hand and what supplies I will need to lay in for another productive year with my bliss.

I have moved all of my viable plants indoors and purchased some indoor grow lights for an area I have designated as my growing zone. I have started my seedlings for the coming year and as I watch them grow the nasty weather outside doesn't take away from my desire to grow our own food.  My darling husband built me a polytunnel last year in hopes of extending our growing season. But this years colder than average for longer periods of time have robbed my growing area outside of its precious heat.  But I will not be discouraged by this because it simply means back to the drawing board and finding alternative ways to keep my plants warm and toasty while the worst of the weather rages.

If you are interested in a sport or activity you can take these colder months to plan out our strategy on how you will pursue your bliss once the weather warms. Mapping out time in your schedule to enjoy those activities or investing in the equipment you will need in order to make your dreams of bliss a reality.

You may find that by watching those who excel in the sport of your choice is a good option. Many times athletes will watch others do what they dream of doing in order to study muscles used or styles engaged in order to learn from others.  You can also read up on the places within your community that offer free access to places to practice or meet other like minded folks. Many communities have groups that will meet to set up matches or just hang out and discuss the thing that interest you most.

Last year we visited Cheekwood Botanical gardens to get ideas for what we wanted in our garden beds. Ideas for plantings as well as advice from those who knew far more than I do regarding plant hardiness in our area.  It is an option if gardening is amongst your list of things that make you happy.

I also spend my winter months going through gardening magazines, gardening websites, and gardening catalogs.  Researching possible plants for our upcoming growing season and learning as much as I can about their care.  It is how I keep the fire in my belly alive for enjoying my warm weather interest during the colder months.

If you are truly interested in learning about something, be that a sport or a hobby you will take the time of year that it is to cold to pursue to learn more. Think of it as a seed in the winter. It may get dropped into the soil by chance during the final days of fall.  But it will protect itself against the cold weather by becoming dormant.  Your dreams don't have to die simply because you cannot actively pursue them.  Think of the off season as your planning period. It is time to do what you need to do to ensure that your bliss is waiting there to blossom as soon as warmer weather returns.

If you are interested in a sport you may begin conditioning your body to perform at it best when warmer weather returns.  Exercises like Yoga often help stretch and tone and can be done in a limited space.  Yoga is not expensive nor does it take over your life. It only helps your body remember what it is created for.  It helps prepare your body for the activities ahead and allows your mind to concentrate on what makes you the happiest.

Many athletes also use visualization and studies done have shown that muscles fire in the same sequence when visualized as they do when the actual activity is undertaken.  So if you cannot be out on the court, visualize yourself practicing that perfect serve in your mind.  It will help your dreams of being great at your bliss a reality when you can actually get out there and play the game of your choice.

When something is important to you there are no real roadblocks to your bliss,  only speedbumps.  Things that may take a little more determination to get over but just as important as the actual activity itself.  It is life's way of testing you to make sure this is something you really want to do.  You cannot walk out onto a court or playing field without preparation.  Even the best athletes stay in top form during their off season.  They stay healthy and active in order to do their best when their season is in full swing by staying focused on the game ahead during the seasons in which they cannot play.

I hope my blog today has given you food for thought on ways to enjoy your bliss even if the weather isn't warm enough to follow through with it.  That regardless of what Mother Nature and the Weather man may say that it is never to early to engage in things that make you happy and make your life worth living.  That you take the time now to start preparing for those days that you can enjoy later by planning out your battle plan on how you are going to fit time in your schedule for those things as well as becoming educated in the activity itself.  Instead of sitting in the cold dark house and saying woo is me.  Life is to short to be miserable and why spend another moment aimlessly wandering through life, when you can be living a life with purpose.

Until Tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and be happy.

Preparing my beds for the coming growing season means I can enjoy my bliss even during the months that the actual activity is not an option.  By preparing the soil and feeding it as well as my dream I am able to continue my bliss even in the colder months. I take advantage of the things I have readily on hand to enrich the soil. Things that most people consider garbage I know is food for my future garden. Kitchen cast offs, leaves and recycled dirt are used in my beds.  With a healthy watering of compost/ worm dropping tea we make ourselves. To ensure that when warmer weather returns I will have the absolute best outcome to our garden and me following my bliss.

Regardless of what your bliss is, take advantage of the slower months to prepare for it.  Collect the materials you will need as well as educate yourself and visualize what you want in your life.  The planning phase is as important as the actual activity itself.  Never allow the whims of nature to deter you from following your bliss, where ever they may lead.

Toxic People and your Bliss

We all know them, we all have them in our lives.  They are those people in your life that suck the life right out of you. They often leave you feeling depressed or anxious, often with a headache or just such a low view of yourself and your dreams when you part company with them that you just don't see the point in continuing on in the path you have chosen.

Many times these people don't realize they are toxic.  I refer to them as energy vampires.  They suck the life force out of you one drop at a time until there is nothing left for yourself. Sometimes these people are our bosses, sometimes they are our coworkers, sometimes they are even the people we share our most private times with such as loved ones and family members.

They are people who have a distorted view of the world and only see the negativity.  You will often hear them mention starving children in China, or how bad life is, or how you are unrealistic for having a positive outlook.  They are out there.  If you had a magical power to see them you would run screaming for the nearest exit every time you see one because they would look similar to a black hole sucking up all the energy and light in a room and taking away the positive energy that exist in most of us.

I am unsure if this is something some that some are born with or it evolves over time and because of many heart breaks and toils.  I know I have not had an ideal life but I still try to keep a realistic view of the world.  I know there are people dying and starving daily all over out planet.  But at the same time I also know there is a lot of beauty in the world if you choose to see it.  There are several methods for dealing with negative people in your life that you cannot avoid.

The first is to limit your exposure to them.  This is often done by politely declining offers for visits or outings with them.  My husband and I knew a toxic couple, every time we were around them we would both leave our couple time with a splitting headache and angry with each other. Even if the other couple was getting along. I have found toxic couples are often very toxic to a healthy relationship (yours).  We began by limiting our time around this couple trying to find ways to interact with them on a limited basis and to do things where there were loads of other people involved. This worked to a degree but their negativity often rolled over into our relationship and we found ourselves drained after any physical contact them.  Including dinners out or meeting up for movie date, or even just hanging out for a relaxing evening playing board games and talking.  The conclusion we came to was that we needed to eliminate this couple from our circle of friends in order to keep our own sanity, wellness and happiness in our marriage.

The second way of dealing with toxic people is to learn to emotionally distance yourself from them.  This comes in very handy when the toxic person is your boss or loved one.  We all have one of those people in our lives. Someone who we cannot avoid or limit our exposure to so we plaster on a smile dread the time and do what has to be done.  Emotionally distancing yourself means your body is in the room but your mind is laying on a tropical beach somewhere enjoying the feel of the wind on your skin and warmth of the sun.  You can still hear and interact with the toxic person but you are taking active steps to protect yourself and your own well being while interacting with them. This comes in particularly handy if the toxic person is a spouse, boss or parent.  You cannot limit or avoid contact with them but you can protect yourself from their venom.

When dealing with toxic people stick to the facts, don't make up excuses why something they say isn't true simply rationalize in your mind why what they say doesn't apply to you, or doesn't affect you. Often times toxic people will say things they believe to be a reality, when in fact everyone has their own version of reality.  It is in the perception of life that we choose to thrive or die.  If they say no one ever succeeds in the music industry and your goal is to perform publicly with your own music.  Just think in your head, ok I am not looking to get rich I am looking to share my gift with the world.  I don't care if I ever see one red cent from my music, although it would be nice I am doing this because it makes me happy.  Money is not the end all be all for me.  If I happen to get paid fabulous but I am not pursuing this dream because I hope to get rich, if I am performing at my local bar on amateur night I will be happy with my musical dreams. The most successful people are those who didn't allow the toxic people in their lives to destroy their dreams and goals. Or learned to deal with them and not allow their negativity to interfere with your own reality.

Another tip when dealing with toxic people it is best to bring reinforcement. This often limits your exposure to their negativity. People are often hesitant to share their views on more intimate matters when there is a witness to their venom.  So bring along a friend or find a coworker to help you get through time spent with a toxic person. There are times this doesn't work, like when your boss wants to talk to you alone about something they don't want others to be knowledgeable of, but at times this is a great way to diffuse a toxic person and keep their rampage in check.

Another way to deal with toxic people is to watch your own body language. Most of are so unaware of the image we portray to others due to how we stand, where our hands are during the conversation or even eye contact.  Toxic people will often attach those who give off the body language of being insecure or doubting themselves.  Walk tall walk proud, and allow your body language to speak volumes if your words cannot say what you really want to say.  Stand feet apart for stability, keep arms and hands at your side not crossed across your body (this is a defensive stance and will encourage their attack). Make eye contact with who is speaking with you, this shows an interest in what they have to say but you aren't looking down or away because although you are interested you will defend yourself against a toxic attack.  Turn your full body to them, much like a cat with a dog they are afraid of.  They turn sideways and bulk up figuring the dog will think they are larger and leave them alone.  Make sure to keep your full body facing them straight on.  Many of these body postures can be read about on various sites online, it just takes a little research. But studies have been done that have found that many times victims become victims because of how they carry themselves.  If you are hunched over, avoiding eye contact or hugging yourself you are sending an open invitation for someone who feels they have power over you to try and exert that power.  It is also why in martial arts they teach you to turn sideways when facing an opponent, giving them a smaller target for striking but to be very aware of who you are fighting and what they are doing with their bodies so that you can defend yourself.

Know you own boundaries, and make sure that those are very firm lines that you will not tolerate being crossed.  Many people refer to these as your personal bubble, it is a distance from your body to another in a physical sense and many times vary from person to person. Some people are far more touchy feely than others and this often times makes us uncomfortable.  It is the strange relative that you don't know very well that insist on hugging you even though you really don't want them in your personal space, it is also your emotional space needed to maintain a healthy mental status. This could be the friend who just doesn't get why you won't do what they are asking of you, or why you won't take their advice when it is offered.  Know you own boundaries and demand respect of those boundaries from others.  If they are unable to do so go back to the tip of emotionally distancing yourself from the other person so that their negativity does not affect you as badly.  The lights are on but nobody is home kind of mentality.

You will encounter toxic people everywhere and we all have off days. Days when nothing goes right and the world just seams to be out to get us. Make sure to be able to delineate toxic people from those who are just going through a rough patch in their lives.  Toxic people are always negative there is never a good day in their world, or if they are they are so rare you never see them.  Try to be patient with those in your life, there may be a lot you don't see or understand that they may be facing. But at the same time take care of yourself and make sure to take the time and protection you need to keep you own sanity and well being firmly in place.

Be a friend or a good employee but do not allow others to make you the dumping ground for their drama.  Listen to a friend when they need a shoulder but remember that their problems are not yours unless they directly affect your life or those you hold dearest to your heart.  Do not take on the issues that toxic people often try to make the problems of others.  Toxic people do not take responsibility for their own actions and are often blind to the death and destruction they leave in their wake.  They only see what they want to see and your emotions and feelings aren't amongst the things they see in their reality.  Do not allow the words and actions of toxic people to interfere with your own inner happiness.  You cannot control the actions of others you can only control your reactions to those actions. And above all else be good to yourself.  If you have to deal with toxic people in your life do something special for yourself when their toxicity levels reach a point that they are beginning to affect you especially if you cannot avoid them all together.  Indulge in a guilty pleasure that you enjoy but rarely allow yourself.  A bubble bath, a bar of your favorite chocolate, that few extra moments in the shower or tub, or whatever makes you feel recharged, rejuvenated and ready to face the world again.

I hope my blog today has given those who face toxic people on a daily basis food for thought. You cannot completely eliminate these people from your life, but you can control how much control you give them over your life.  Take care of yourself and never allow the words or actions of others to dictate how you feel about yourself and your dreams or goals.

Until Tomorrow Blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and be happy.

Life is like a garden, cultivate the life you want to Live

There are many things in this life we have no control over.  There are many things that we do and those things we can active steps to change, but if you spend your time stressing over things that you cannot directly affect you often wear yourself out emotionally and physically and lose site of the truly important things in your life.

Into every life a rain must fall was a favorite expression of my grandmother.  She used to say you cannot enjoy the sunny days without a few rainy ones sprinkled in to remind you of how wonderful your life is.  She was always comparing life to nature and how everything begins with a small seed, or how the warmth of the sun can bring a plant to life but to much sun can kill a plant with to little rain.  I think she was a gardener through and through and I often think of her while I am tolling away in my garden during the summer months.

I find solace in my garden. It helps me stay focused and realize that although right this second it appears there is nothing happening that beneath the soil that tiny seed is doing amazing things.  It is breaking free of that hard protective shell and spreading it roots down deep into the soil to give it the foundation it needs to grow into a tall productive plant.  That even when a plant can look its worst it will often come back with some TLC and a little water.  To much water can kill a plant much like life it a balancing act of finding that happy medium.

Last summer I spent many hours working with my garden. It is something that brings me great joy.  Feeling that rich dirt between my fingers as I plant my seeds in the late winter with hopes and dreams of having a garden that will not only feed my bliss but also feed my family. Watching as those tender sprouts push their way through that soil in a matter of days or weeks and becomes the plant that will grow big and strong and produce the fruits and veggies that is so incredibly delicious on my table.  I also have to sit by and watch as the weakest of my plants don't survive and wither and die.  Simply because although they may be of the same plant as another seed they may lack the ability to thrive once they have begun their growth.

I know that not all my seeds will make it and even those that do I must weed out and pull the poorest in order for the strongest to survive for my garden.  I plant 3 seeds per pot to ensure that I get at least one healthy plant.  Now you may be asking yourself what does all this gardening information have to do with following my bliss. Simple, life is a lot like gardening.  You go into it with hopes and dreams of finding what makes you happy.  You pursue avenues that may or may not come to fruition and that only time and patience can tell exactly what the end result will be.  We all try things that don't work out.  But do not be discouraged by your failures, learn from them.

If you were gardening and half your plants didn't survive you wouldn't blame yourself because you knew you had tried and at least some of those ideas and dreams became what you wanted.  If you have provided your dreams and goals with the time and energy and they don't survive to produce the fruit of happiness perhaps it wasn't the path you were meant to be on. Perhaps in the process of replacing those seedlings you met that person who will help you find that path, or better yet perhaps you still had a few life lessons to learn in order to better focus your energy on the right end goal for you.

Before I began gardening I often didn't understand some of the things my grandmother said. I just figured she was getting older and perhaps a wee bit senile. But now that I find myself wrist deep in dirt during the coldest months of the year her advise often floods back to me.  I remember spending time on my knees in her garden pulling weeds that would choke out the plants and the smell of that sweet corn straight off the stalk.  I remember sitting around our dinner table  enjoying the fruits and veggies she grew and even into the colder months enjoying the harvest from canning she did every year at harvest time.

I have many happy memories of my Mema's garden.  I also remember scratching at bug bites and sweating like a work horse out in that garden every summer.  It may not have felt so great when I was working my butt off but the end result was always worth the effort.  I understand now why she so often spoke in gardening terms because getting back in touch with nature has given me a lot of insight into my own human frailties and my own body.

You can work with nature or you can work against it.  Often times if you work against it your endeavors fail and you end up miserable and confused.  However if you work with it, another favorite of hers was to everything there is a season, you will often find your bounties piling up around you like a great gardener during the harvesting time.  With so much you need to can or dehydrate or share your bountiful blessings.

My Mema taught me to watch nature and take my lead from her.  The apple trees blossom in the spring and put on quiet the show. Covered in beautiful blossoms that float through the air and drape the air with their sweet scent but their apples are not ready for harvesting until the fall and a lot can happen between those cool spring days and those cooling fall nights.  The weather can turn nasty, the bugs may discover your treasure and a wary gardener always knows to be on guard and protect those treasured apples from pest and disease.  Your dreams are a lot like those apples.  If you don't learn to do what is important in following your dreams and protect them from those who would eat away at your dreams and goals you may end up with nothing but a pest infested fruit that is not edible or beautiful.

I remember her teaching me about which crops did best with the cold, and like dreams some are best left to only do a bit at during each week, while other crops require more of the suns warmth and are much higher maintenance.  Tomatoes are like that, they require constant attention. To little nutrients and your plants won't produce fruit, to much water and they drowned.  It is a balancing act as is many dreams and goals.  To little attention and they will never produce the desired end result and to much and you may become frustrated waiting for the sun to shine on them and produce fruit.  I remember sitting and watching the tomatoes growing marveling at the tiny buds that attracted every bee in a 5 mile radius to pollinate them and yet even then not all buds became those juicy ripe tomatoes that I loved so much on my salads and sandwiches.

If you want the life you deserve you must cultivate it.  You must find that happy medium between over-watering and under-watering.  You must explore and talk to those already on the path and learn from their mistakes and hopefully share some of your own along the way.  Nothing in life worth having comes easy.  It is always going to be a struggle but if you are a dedicated gardener you learn from your mistakes, you move forward with your knowledge and in the harvest time you reap the benefits of all your hard work. 

I hope my blog today has given you some food for thought, I hope it has if in a round about way helped you to understand a little better about working with your personal nature and allowing your dreams and goals to unfold at their own rate.  There may be days when it feels as though nothing is happening and that time is standing still, but then you will turn around  realize that a beautiful fruit has been hiding under a large leaf and is almost ready to harvest and enjoy.

Until Tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and stay happy.

Like the seeds in this growing tray, turn your head to the light.  Allow the sun to feed and fuel your dreams. Bask in the warmth of those who support you and learn to bend in the showers of those who don't.  Take a lesson from nature and weed out those ideas and dreams that aren't strong enough to stand the harsh weather and protect your bliss from the freezing winds of cruel words and people. 

Be good to yourself and demand respect from others, because if they are not capable of respecting your dreams and goals they are not worthy of the attention and energy they drain from your life.  Be in harmony with the things around you and let everything happen at its own pace.  

You can learn a lot from nature if you will only give her the chance to teach you.  Many blessings and it is never to early to sow the seeds of your future life, even if it is simply putting a small seed in moist Earth and letting it become the plant is is destined to be. 

Walking away from things that no longer make you Happy

We all have them, those things that once brought us so much happiness but something has changed, in ourselves, in our relationships, or even in our emotions so that there is little or no joy left in those activities, relationships, or things.

There comes a time in every life that we must weight the pros of cons of different things and decide is this the path I want to be on?  Is this path where I am meant to be, is this just a glitch in my life or this a life altering decision.  If something is no longer bringing you happiness you have to decide if it is time to move forward and release that energy back into the universe in order to find the happiness you deserve.

Many times situations can be remedied and relationships made better, but sometimes they cannot. Sometimes we have to decide if this is something that we can change or mend or if it is beyond that point and we are simply spinning our wheels.  We have to make sure that decisions that regard more than one person, namely a spouse or partner is not one sided.  We cannot go from "happy" to miserable in the blink of an eye.  We have to discuss our relationship and what isn't working with those in our life that our decision may impact.  We cannot take action to follow our bliss before discussing those kind of changes with our partners in life.

We don't have to stay in an abusive relationship regardless of what a partner may want, be that physical, emotional, or even verbal.  We don't have to allow ourselves to be punching bags for their anger and unresolved issues.  But if you are in a relationship with someone who does believe that your marriage or partnership is a good one then you first must talk to them before making drastic changes in your relationship status.

If you are working at a job that you feel is a dead end. If there is no way of moving up the ladder of success and there is no way to find a happy place within that employment, try talking to your boss regarding the issues you are having.  Poor working conditions, lack of compensation for your time, lack of appreciation for your efforts. Be strong and stand up for yourself.  If you cannot find a happy medium do not walk out, give notice work through that notice so that you are not left with a horrible stain on your employment record.

Many times things can be made better by open and honest communications, sometimes they cannot be prepared to move forward if the situation does not or cannot be changed.  Do not allow a bad situation to dictate how you live your life.  If you are miserable in your job and there is no changing your current situation you may want to start looking around for other employment to keep a roof over your head and food on your table before giving your notice or even talking to your boss.  It is always good to keep your options open but keep in mind the basic necessities of life when forming your life plan.  It is often easier to find employment when you have employment rather than having spaces in your resume while you are job hunting.  And never under any circumstances ever trash talk previous jobs or employment experiences while discussing a possible future with a new possible employer. It reflects badly on yourself in the eyes of the interviewer. It is best to be vague than to give details they do not need regarding why you are looking to leave a current employer.

We all have bad days, days that make us wonder if this is the life we are meant to be living. Is your current situation worth the wear and tear on your emotions, your body and your heart?  If not do not stand idly by and allow the actions of others to dictate your own self worth. Take a stand, do something, change your life for the better.  There is no time like today to begin creating the life you want to lead.  Even babysteps are steps in the direction you want to go.  Don't stick your head in the sand and try to pretend that things will change, maybe they will maybe they won't.  Sometimes when we tolerate bad behavior it changes for the worst.  Those around us feel that since we don't speak up or say this is not what I signed on for that we are content to live a miserable existence.  If you don't stand up for yourself then who will?

Finding your bliss is about being happy.  Happy in the life choices you choose, happy in the relationships you invest your time, energy and heart into.  It is about living a life worth living not merely scrapping by and doing what is expected of you.  Many times others will tell you that nothing is going to change, that the next relationship will be as bad as your current one because you are the one picking the bad people to have relationships with. Or that all jobs are horrible but as an adult you have to learn to suck it up and go to work. That is not true.  If all of your past relationships are taking on the same tone, maybe it is time for you to change. Take some time to get to know yourself before leaping into another one.  Don't do what my dad always referred to as Mario relationships.  Jumping one to another like the platforms in a video game.  Take some time to let your heart and mind heal. Learn to be good company for yourself and there fore expect the same kind of respect from those you allow into your heart.

All jobs have sucky moments, yes but not all jobs are hell on earth. Some jobs are that way because of managers who don't do their jobs well, some are threatened by the talented people they are surrounded by because they know that although they may have skills that everyone has a different set of skills they bring to the table. So instead of embracing their own skills they would rather tear down your confidence and make you think you have no value. I have in the past worked for a couple of those.  I have also worked for some amazing people who promoted my skills, gave me jobs that would help me build those skills and allowed me to do what I did best.  Those are the managers that good jobs have.  Those are the kind of people who take team building seriously and who want you and those you work with to be the best you can be. Those are the kind of managers that make even sucky jobs a whole less sucky.

I know that during tough economic times we should all be thankful to have a job and that being single is not easy. Been there done that.  But the reality of the situations is this.  Would you rather have a lifetime of nothing special or moments of pure unadulterated happiness that made your life worthwhile.  I heard something something similar in the movie "Fried Green Tomatoes" it stuck with me.  And it became my battle cry for finding my own personal bliss.

I find motivation in the strangest places at times, movies, music, great literature.  I read and experience all that I can so that I have a buffet of things to remember and things to strive to become.  Life isn't about taking that next breath, it is about the moment that take your breath away.  It is about living life to the fullest and being happy.  It is about experiencing new sensations with a clear pallet and allowing all the wonderful taste and sensations to awaken the nerves in your body and the thoughts in your mind. It is about living, not counting the moments until you die.

I hope my blog today has given everyone some food for thought. I hope that you take even a small babystep today towards finding your bliss.  I hope that you learn to find happiness in the smallest things and realize that our time on this planet is limited and that we don't have a unlimited supply of tomorrows to make our dreams a reality.  You don't have to run out and join a commune or shave your head and sell flowers in the airport, unless that is just what makes you truly happy.  But you do have to wake up, smell the coffee and begin living your life like you have no tomorrows in the bank of life.  You have to realize that the only person on this planet who can make you happy is you.

You can have a great job and a great relationship and enjoy both, but without inner happiness this is just a temporary state of mind.  You have to discover that place inside your soul that makes you complete.  You have to find that one or two or half a dozen things that bring you inner peace and make time in your schedule to follow those dreams.  You have to be who you were born to be.

If my words have stirred something in your gut I am glad, if they have not then perhaps you are not ready to find your bliss.  Everyone matures and evolves at their own pace. There is no set guidelines in place regarding at what age you get fed up with being miserable and say enough already it is time for me to discover my own bliss.  If you aren't touched by my writing chances are you aren't ready yet. But keep in mind most people at some point in their lives reach that point. Usually it is brought on by the death of a loved one, and we reach our conclusions regarding our mortality and how fleeting time is.  Never criticize those who have reached that point because as some point in your life you will be amongst those numbers and you will need the guidance of those who have already climbed that mountain to find your own.

I hope that my blog finds all well and following their own bliss, that my blog has inspired others to begin the journey I have begun and hopefully along the way learn the true meaning of life and that happiness is a precious thing that cannot be replaced or ignored.

Until Tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and be happy.

An interview done with the amazing Hitchcock who created timeless treasures during his lifetime.  I prefer to study those who are successful in finding what I am looking for to see what steps they took to find their own bliss in order to better pursue my own.  Clear concise and to the point. A good watch and hopefully it inspires others to do the same. Look for your clear horizon and create the life you want to live.

How will I recognize my Bliss

Sometimes we follow a path hoping it will take us where we want to go in life.  We trudge along waiting for that life changing experience that will make us happy.  We think if we get the job of our dreams that it will change or life for the better.  If we make upper management and get that corner office that the world will be our oyster.  That if we marry the person of our dreams and plan a life together that our mission in life will be complete and we will finally be happy.

These are all temporary situations that fate, time and destiny can steal away from us.  In the downturn of the economy many jobs have become redundant, many upper managements positions have become outdated, and many times that perfect person is human and we discover years down the line that they have either become a stranger to us or they have evolved into someone we no longer recognize.  You cannot base your bliss on aspects of your life that could dissolve before your very eyes.

Your home can be lost in a fire or natural disaster, you marriage could dissolve due to miscommunications or even bad life choices.  All of these things can change and be gone like smoke on the wind. You bliss however cannot, it is not a physical state or material positions.  You bliss is where you find happiness and how you get through tough times.

Many people find solace in religion, they follow a set list of rules that at some point they felt applied to their lives.  As their lives change their faith in those in rules may become stronger or it may be threatened.  I think that those who are able to cling to those beliefs without fear or doubt are blessed.  They always have their religious affiliations to find solace in and hopefully they also find bliss in that life choice.  As long as they aren't trying to penalize others for believing differently than they, do no harm no foul.

Finding your bliss also means respecting others enough to allow them the same freedoms you have found in your own life.  It doesn't mean trying to convince others that you path is the only path or treating them as though they are incapable of making their own life choices.  There is no harm in praying for others, or lighting candles or sending positive healing energy their direction as long as it doesn't interfere with their own free will.  It means respecting others and treating them as you yourself would want to be treated, even if others are at that state in their development.  It is a state of mind regarding what makes you happy and having the freedom to pursue those dreams and goals. Regardless of what others may think of those goals and dreams.  It means finding out what works for you and applying that knowledge to your own personal life.

Sometimes finding your bliss can be complicated, sometimes it can be just out of your reach but in your gut you know it is there.  Sometimes it comes in unusual ways or due to unforeseen circumstances.  It doesn't happen because you wake up one morning and say I am going to be happy dammit.  It comes because you open up your heart and your mind to the possibility of it.  It happens when you least expect it and when you have dreamed of it for years.  It is nothing and everything all rolled up in a ball of cotten candy and tied with a red velvet ribbon. It is what happens when you are busy living your life.

Sometimes your bliss may be standing right in front of you but if you are ready to accept it, it will remain a mystery to you.  Many times I have passed by things that could have made me happy but due to the circumstance I was currently living I refused to acknowledge their presence.  I was so busy keeping my eye on the long term goals I had in my minds eye that I was blind to things staring me right in the face.  Finding your bliss means opening your eyes and finding happiness where ever it may be.  It means being able to find joy in the little things in life and being able to welcome new experiences for a chance of growth and enlightenment.

Finding your bliss means that if given the chance to have a new experience you don't turn away and ignore it, you weigh the pros and cons in your life to see if it is something that might be a new life altering experience.  It means even if you have never had an interest in something not taking a chance to see if perhaps there might be something there to in some way make your life a little bit better. Maybe not by the actual project but by the new friends you make along the way.

Many times I have attended a class I might not have had an interest in but went anyway, just to be able to say OK I tried that, wasn't my cup of tea but most of the people I met were amazing. They were following their own bliss and having new experiences by doing so.  I am not saying that you have to run out and sign up for every low cost or free class out there. Pick and choose what things you would like to know more about or things that might prove to help you find your bliss. Be that cooking or wine making, or painting or whatever.  I may have no skills in that particular area and I might truly suck at it, but if it makes me happy and makes my life better than it is time well spent.  If it turns out to be something that brings me no happiness or in any way make my life better then I try to take a look around me at those in the class. We all have similar interest in one way or another.  It might not be our passion but it might be a similar interest in our families, life goals, or even just saving money or living healthier.  You just never know until you take the leap and try something different.

Will every path you take lead you to where you want to go?  No, but every path you take, every mistake you make along the way will help you learn more about yourself until you know who you truly are inside and out.  I like to remind my darling husband that had I not dated before we met I would not have firmly planted in my head what I will and will not accept in a relationship.  All that time I spent dating those who didn't fit into my ideal helped me see first hand exactly what I wanted and in the process learned where my own boundaries lay.  I do not regret the mistakes of my past because they helped me become the person I was meant to be.

There is only a waste of your energy and your time if you do not learn something from the experience.  I like to believe that everything happens for a reason.  That often times road blocks and speed bumps come up to test my determination to make my dreams a reality.  That without them I wouldn't truly appreciate the end result when I get there nor would I recognize bliss when I am nose to nose with it.

Yes some rain does fall into my life on occasion, yes I do wake up some days and go really, another day this side of the dirt blanket, I don't wanna.  I am not a happy person by nature, believe it or not.  But every day I get up, face whatever the day is going to throw at me, try hard to find the happiness in the whole experience, not simply the moments and get one small step closer to the things I enjoy and I create the life I want one very small baby step at a time.

I have those days when nothing goes right.  My coffee has grounds in it.  I slip in the mud while walking my dog in the cold rain and bust my butt and cover myself in the mud.  But when those kind of days hit I may sit in that cold mud with the rain hitting me in the face and just for a  moment try to be thankful for what went right.  I woke up, there is a major accomplishment.  I am at an age when it isn't uncommon for those I have known my entire life to pass in their sleep.  I have had many friends who didn't make it to the age I have.  I am sitting on the hard ground covered in mud and I am thankful for the mud, it is said to do wonderful things for your skin.  I can feel the stinging rain on my face which means that I can still feel things even if they aren't the most blissful feelings in the world.  I am thankful for all the blessings in my life large and small alike.  I do not delineate between large and small blessings. Blessings are blessings regardless of their size.

Finding your happiness is a state of mind, it isn't being the most beautiful, or talented, it isn't being the richest or the most famous.  It is being happy no matter what gets thrown in your path.  It is learning to embrace those difficult times and making them your own.  It means the ability to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and continue on.  It means having the state of mind that it will all work out in the end and that nothing happens without a reason.

Sometimes we won't recognize our bliss even when it is standing in front of us.  It will be a stranger to us because we have not opened our eyes and our hearts to the wonderful possibilities that lay in front of us.  It is like searching your entire life for the perfect partner only to realize that they have been standing by your side all along but you were to blind or to focused to realize the true potential they have in your life to make it all the better.

In order to find your true bliss you must be willing to look at life as it really is.  You take off those rose colored glasses to discover that although the world isn't a rose garden it does have many aspects in that can and do make us happy when we allow them to.  It is about learning to live in the moment while still holding firm to those long term goals.  It means finding happiness where you can find it no matter how big or how small and living in that moment. Learning to stop and smell the roses even when you cannot afford to buy the flowers.

I hope my blog today has given you some food for thought. I hope that you take a moment in your day to look around you and truly enjoy the beauty that surrounds us all but many are so oblivious to that we are blind to them.  It doesn't cost anything to stop and look around, and the world isn't going to end if you are two minutes behind schedule because you took the time to stop and admire the clouds or smell that beautiful flower, or just compliment a complete stranger on how good they smell or how pretty the look today.  I have also found that random acts of kindness make me feel better.  Buying a strangers coffee or complimenting a complete stranger just because I can. But I am odd like that.

Until Tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and be happy.

Some people would see a cold winter day, an old wheel-barrel turned on its belly and the cold ice dripping off it.  A gardener in hiatus if you will. I see something completely different.  I see the beautiful patterns the ice has created on the barrel.  I see the possibility of my future garden.  I see in my minds eye hours of happiness spent digging in the dirt and creating food where before it was only a seed and dirt.  I see my bliss.  Sometimes the most mundane things in life can bring you the most happiness.  It is all a matter of perspective.

Why should I follow my Bliss?

It is often said that happy people live longer. They seam to have an inner glow about them that radiates out those around them.  They move with a purpose through life and seek out others with similar interest and similar goals.  They motivate others to find their own inner happiness.  Be that a job they love, a partner who is their equal or even just following a dream to accomplish something in this world that is bigger than themselves.

They don't wallow around in self pity and say woo is me and they don't wait for a diagnosis of dying in order to start living.  People who follow their bliss don't ask those questions like "why are we here", or "what does it all mean" because they already have those answers.  Why are we all here and what does it all mean is simple.  We were created to live a life well lived. If that means becoming the great artist that in our souls we already know we are, or if that means simply doing something you are really passionate about at every given opportunity.

I have read that you shouldn't follow your bliss, that it is a unrealistic dream set in place by those who want to lead you down the yellow brick road. That is it an unattainable state of mind that in reality only leaves you broken and destroyed because so few actually get to that place in their lives where they are doing what truly makes them happy and often times once they obtain it they learn it wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

I say that those who do not support your decision to be happy are so miserable in their own lives they are threatened by your determination to be happy.  Misery loves company and why should you be happy when they cannot or will not find a way to be happy themselves. Many people are content to merely exist instead of taking the bull by the horns and doing something to make their lives better.

If you are in the self examination phase of finding your bliss, or taking baby steps to make it a reality, or even just exploring options regarding things you have wanted to try but have never done so for a wide variety of reasons, there will always be haters.  There will be those folks who believe that life is about hard work and dedication. About following the rules and doing what you are told. Never bumping the system or even questioning the rules.  There are more haters than there are supporters of your dreams.

Sometimes haters can become supporters with time and patience on your part. Sometimes they cannot, they simply cannot put their own ideals aside long enough to see the forest for the trees.  They feel that although others have found their bliss and are living a life they truly enjoy that you will always be amongst the number of folks who don't.

When I decided about a decade ago to get my CDL's my loving father whom I adored and trusted had a running bet with my husband at the time that I would not finish school much less get my CDL's.  I spent 3 months 5 days a week going to school to learn to drive a tractor trailer.  I worked a full time job after school to support my family while attending school, and for every snide remark and every doubt they voiced it simply made me more determined to get license and more determined to do well.  My loving father lost his bet and in the end actually said he was proud of me for following my own path and doing what made me happy.  After that he learned if I wanted something bad enough it didn't matter what mountain I had to move to make it happen, even if I had to do it at a teaspoon every trip I would make it happen.  His doubt in me made me into a stronger person by letting me learn my own strengths and his sarcasm actually gave me the determination to make my dreams a reality.

I do not drive a truck anymore.  I have actually retired my commercial drivers license but it in no way was because of his thoughts regarding female truck drivers or his doubts in my ability to drive.  I drove a truck for 5 years, got myself out of debt and got out of a marriage that didn't make me happy.  I have always been a rebel of sorts, doing what was best for me and my family regardless of having or not having a support system in place regarding the decisions I make and the life choices I choose.

I know that not everyone is that headstrong or determined to live life by their own rules and to follow their own path.  I was simply because I had more at stake than just following my bliss.  I knew if I didn't take action I would never be able to provide my family with the things they needed in order to just survive must less thrive.

Every dream and every goal has a life span. Sometimes those lifespans reach across an entire lifetime, sometimes they are means to an end.  I know that at times you think you will always want something or that your situation will never change, but the only thing that is inevitable in this lifetime is death, taxes, and change.  Things change, people change, and what makes you happy can change.  Don't lock yourself into a dream if that isn't the dream or goal that is in your gut.  You may want something so bad you can taste it but at some time in the future that dream may change or that goal may alter into something else.  Go with the flow.

Many times I have pursued things that I thought would make me happy.  And in the end they didn't live up the reality I had created in my head, that is ok. That is the nature of the beast.  You change, your life changes, your dreams can change as well.  Now if you have always dreamed of painting and you start painting only to discover that you are not as talented as you thought you were, you may have to take a step back and do one of two things. You can either say OK tried that not for me and walk away from it. Or you can practice and practice and then practice some more until it is second nature to you and suddenly your creativity takes over and you find yourself getting better and better.

I often try new things just to challenge myself.  I may not have a burning desire in my gut to make something a reality but a mild curiosity to see where it will lead me.  I am always trying to learn new skills and learn new things. I enjoy the whole learning process. Going from the have no clue to I have heard of that and it didn't work for me phase.  I felt that way about school and probably why my major has changed 3 times during my academic career.  But the truth of the matter is I am a better person for trying on all three hats until I found one that fit and that I enjoyed wearing.

I began my educational goal of being management so my associates is in administration.  Upon finishing that degree I decided that management wasn't the right path for me so during my bachelors degree I concentrated on electronic communications, which I thoroughly enjoy but the idea of sitting in a room typing out memos or even dealing with the whole communications aspect wasn't a great fit for me.  I finally decided on accounting because I met taxes and fell in love with that field.  I love advising others as to how save money. How to fill out their initial tax forms with their employer to ensure they aren't paying taxes at the end of the year but also to ensure that Uncle Sam isn't getting to play with their money.  I just enjoy helping others. I also adore the financial aspect of it. Numbers to me always make sense, be that a spread sheet, a balance sheet or just keeping books for a company or private individual. 

I find myself in my spare time creating excel graphics to help my darling husband understand where we need to trim our household budget or why we cannot afford to buy that expensive toy he has been drooling over.  I like numbers, I also enjoy writing and creating art with my camera.  I am a very multi dimensional person.  I doubt I will ever make a living at taking pictures, but it is something that brings me joy.  I enjoy writing and so I blog, to exercise those muscles. Once upon a time I had a dream of writing books, preferably fiction because I could create the world in which I wanted my characters to live. But I also know that my writing is not good enough to make a living doing that either. Now I might make some extra cash on the side with my camera or even make a check as a freelance writer but I lack the dedication and the passion to make those my career of choice.  Who knows my path may change and I might end up as a photographer or a writer before my journey reaches its end but if not I will still enjoy taxes and bookkeeping.

Life is to short to lock yourself into a role that doesn't fit, and at times we all find ourselves living a life we never envisioned for ourselves. But finding your bliss is about so much more than just loving the job you do or finding your version of paradise on earth.  It is about being happy with the life you live and learning to have that happy place to escape to when the rest of your life gets out of control.  It is about loving yourself enough to make your own happiness a priority and not just working so hard to make others happy in your life.

Finding your bliss is important because when you find your bliss and it changes you are more able to make the adjustments in your life and do what makes you happy instead of staying on a path that no longer works for you.  It is about caring enough about yourself to do what is important to you and for you and to survive the hard times by having those positive memories and positive thoughts already firmly in place and the ability to adapt and survive the tough times.

We all need something that gives us comfort. Some find that comfort in a the bottom of a bottle which down the line causes more issues than it cures.  Some of us find it in a loyal friend (either two or four legged) but those things are fleeting and won't be around always.  Some of us find in our gardens, or in our paintings, or in our photography or even in the love of our significant others.  But many things in life are fleeting whether we realize it or not.  Friends may come and go, partners may change or leave, and things that you once found happiness in may longer bring you the happiness they once did.

Life changes and in order to stay happy you have to learn to change with it.  You have to learn to roll with the punches that life throws and as someone who has followed their bliss it is much easier to adapt and change and follow a path that may be unfamiliar or even foreign to you.  Change isn't easy, and many people cannot adapt.  Did you know that men often die shortly after retiring because suddenly their self value plummets when they are no longer active within the economy.  Many men actually identify their value as human beings with their ability to provide for their families. If they do not cultivate activities and interest to follow after retirement many simply feel that there is no reason to continue on.

Women often go through a mourning period when their last child grows up and moves out. They refer to that as the empty nest syndrome. Suddenly for the first time they have nothing pressing in their lives.  They have spend the majority of their adult lives caring for others and have no clue how to care for themselves.  Change is not easy regardless of your gender, age, ethnic background or cultural differences.  It affects everyone in different ways. Some people it makes mad, others it may make depressed, some it may put you off your food or make you take a long hard look at your life. But the one constant is bliss.

If you can find something that sparks your passion that no matter what is going to be there regardless if for 5 years or 50 it gives you something to channel that energy into, to lose yourself in and to escape to during those changes. It gives you something to focus on so that you aren't sitting around going woo is me.  It will give you a distraction while the dust settles and life continues you.  It will give you a firm foundation that you can build the next chapter of your life on.

You may never "find" your bliss, but finding your bliss isn't about living the perfect life. It is about living a life well lived.  It is about finding purpose and something that motivates you to lead you where you were born to go.  It is about being happy no matter what may changes in your life and learning to accept change as part of life.

With a dream or goal in the works you have that stability to help absorb the pain of change and give you a focus for the life you want to create. It gives you something to fall back on and a sense of peace you wouldn't have without it.  It gives you something to say ok this has gone to hell in a handbasket but it is ok because I still have this.  Be that losing your job, losing your spouse, losing your home, losing a parent, or losing your dog.  It gives you something to be happy about, even when you don't want to be happy at all.

I hope my blog today gives you hope. I hope it helps others realize how important it is to follow your bliss.  That regardless if others feel your dreams or goals are silly or a waste of your time or resources this is something you need to do for yourself.  That without it you will be lost in a sea of despair when those life altering things happen.  Will you ever make a living doing what you love, who knows.  But you will never know if you do not follow your bliss and create a life worth living.

Until tomorrow blog buddies, be safe, be sane and be happy.

Winter is the season when the whole world seems to go to sleep. The weather is cold, the ground is hard, and the trees and plants seem to be dead. Since there is little else to do, it is a time that is conducive to working hard. There isn't much else to do, and the weather else seems to suggest that we must buckle down and do the things that we have been avoiding. This is not a bad thing. It can very satisfying to work hard and be creative. Creativity is part of our makeup. Without a purpose in our lives, depression would quickly set in.

Winter poems

These are not my words but this is my photo taken with my point and shoot camera, taking baby steps towards my goals and dreams make my life worth living.  I am still saving for my dream camera and although some medical and financial issues have taken their toil on my fund I am still hopeful and confidant that when the time is right this too shall be a reality.

Knowing your limits in following your Bliss

Sometimes our lives get crazy hectic. Between family obligations, work, school, hobbies, sleep, proper nutrition as well as so many other things that can at times begin to take over our lives it is often hard to follow your bliss.  You may find that between working a 40+ hour workweek and trying to stay on top of current obligations that you cannot squeeze one more single hour into your life per week to pursue the things that make you happy.

There is no sin in realizing your limitations and doing what needs to be done in order to maintain balance.  Things change, projects get finished or seasons pass.  People come and go in your life and your things happen that remove obstacles or lighten work loads.  If you are searching for time to follow your bliss but are coming up short on the time factor don't beat yourself up.  The wonderful thing about following your bliss is sometimes it can be down right difficult to find the time to do the things that are important to you.

Don't stress it, part of being a responsible adult is knowing your own limitations.  There are many ways to follow your bliss that don't require extensive commitment to time or funds.  There is research regarding the subject matter that interest you which often only takes the time you can give as you can give it. Costing nothing to look things up on the internet or visit gatherings of those interested in the thing that interest you.

There is also testing the waters to see if this might be something that could be a good fit for your current life and how you will manage to find the time required to learn a new skill or finish a new project.  Everything comes in its own time and at its own pace.  A dear friend of mine once said if she wanted something but for whatever reason it wasn't the right time for her she would walk away from it. If it is meant to be it will still be there when the time was right for her and if it wasn't, then it wasn't the best choice for her at that time in her life. She has applied this to her life choices for many years and is all the happier for doing it.

Sometimes we get an idea in our head and although at the time it may appear to be the cat's meow and exactly what we need in our lives to make us happy.  When it reality the addition of it to our lives may just complicate our current situation or stress us out further bring no happiness but loads of additional obligations with it that we cannot handle at this point in our lives.  As rational, responsible adults we must understand that although it would be awesome to have all the time in the world and all the funds in the world to follow our dreams at times we have to backshelf those things until the right time comes along.

Now I am not saying never pursue your dreams but have a game plan.  If you know that at this time in your life you are already committed to 4 committees with your local community and 40+ hours per week with your employer, and your kids are needing your undivided attention for whatever reason for the next 6 months, game practice, school events, etc..... Then recognize that those limitations already exist.  And instead of stressing yourself out further by adding additional things onto your plate begin to realize that if you want to follow your bliss you are going to have to start saying No to other projects.  You are going to have to cut back on things you allow to take up your valuable space and time and focus on some things in your life that will make you happy.

I have often been referred to as being over analytical because before making a decision I will go through a process of looking at something from all sides.  How much of a time commitment will this require.  Do I have the expertise to make this a successful project for me?  Am I willing to give 110% for X amount of time in order to master this new skill or to finish this project.  If I cannot honestly answer yes to these questions I do not begin a new project.  I will not be able to finish every project I take on in an allotted time frame nor will every single project I launch into be a raving success but I know if I give all I have to give and it isn't at least I didn't short change it or myself by not trying my best.  I also make a pro and cons list regarding the decision.  If I do this what are the possible long term benefits of doing this, what are the possible negative side effects of taking this action.  If I do this how will it affect those in my life that I love and care for?  Is this the best action for me to take at this point in my life?  If not will this ever be a good option for my life and what would have to change to make that a reality.

Everything comes in its own time and at its own pace.  I have waited decades to pursue some of my personal dreams.  Waiting and researching the subject matter so that when it comes down to the decision to take action I am not only mentally and physically ready for those changes in my life. But also educated and familiar enough with the subject matter that I can speak from an informed place regarding questions I might have and actually be familiar enough with the terminology to stay tuned into the conversations I overhear and know exactly what they are talking about.

Sometimes opportunities arise that we feel are just to good to pass up.  But when the time comes to take advantage of those opportunities we find ourselves stressed and dreading the exact things we have longed for.  Something cannot bring you true bliss if you are finding your plate to full to enjoy it.  Everything happens when it destined to happen.  Sometimes we have to take baby steps towards those goals that we feel will make our life worth while.  Be that doing further research, or just mulling it over in heads and clearing up our busy schedules to make it a reality.

Do not beat yourself up if you have put off another year before putting in that dream garden, or if you have hold off on starting back to school, or even waiting and purchasing small items towards that long term goal of your happiness. Destiny just might surprise you and allow your schedule or finances to free up to help you pursue those dreams and make them a reality, if given enough time to make them happen.  Do not loose site of your goals and dreams, just kick it down a notch and take a realistic look at your life and see what must change in order to make them a reality.

I hope my blog today has given you food for thought. If you have been considering doing something but right now doesn't feel like the perfect time to launch into yet another project see what needs to change in your current life for that to be a possibility.  It is never to late to follow your bliss, nor is it to early to begin the planning phase of following your heart.  Action begins with planning.  Actions can be taken but before that can occur you must take a long hard look at all aspects of your life to ensure that the absolute best possible outcome is what the end result will be.

Until tomorrow blog buddies.  Stay safe, stay sane, and stay happy.

No time left for you: The Guess Who

Sometimes there is no time for the things we believe will bring us happiness until we can make that time never allow your current life to dictate your future happiness.  Look at your current life and make the time you need to pursue your dreams even if that means you have to wait until

the time is right to make that happen.  Once again music is my salvation.

Making space in your existing space for your Bliss

Have you ever dreamed of a room dedicated only to whatever makes your passion bloom?  Perhaps you dreamed of making a room of your home into your own personal retreat.  Instead of waiting for your kids to grow up and turning their bedrooms into that perfect crafting space or even a tranquil spot to enjoy a good book or just escape the hectic lifestyle so many of us live try multipurposing an existing area into an area that you can follow your bliss in our own little corner of your home.

My office area doubles as a food pantry. I know that is an combination but it works for me.  I can close the door and have an area to work and do what I need to do to make me happy.  I can leave the door open when I am simply brainstorming or putting the pieces together for a future blog or even just want a break from my work to talk to others in my household or let guest know I am not heavily involved and would welcome the break.

Many times we all have under utilized areas in our home. A garage that doesn't see much action other than parking our cars or a place for the kids to play on rainy days.  Perhaps it is a closet that is filled to max with things that we no longer need or want. I have seen some really creative uses of space when it comes to utilizing what we have in order to follow your dreams.  All it takes is a little creative energy and some thinking outside the box.

I utilize shelving I purchase second hand, making every square inch count for as much as possible.  Going up rather than out with items I need to find or organize for later use.  I often multipurpose items so that this season they are for one of my passions and another season they may be utilized to follow another.  My second bathroom has been converted into a fermenting room / growing space for our future garden by using a shelving unit that goes behind the toilet.  I can place my growing trays on the shelving unit. Replace the light bulb in the room with a grow light for providing the light needed since there are no windows. I do have to juggle things around as I work on multiple projects but find it very useful of a dead space rarely used in our day to day lives.

You don't have to wait until your children are grown and gone to pursue what makes you happy.  Everyone deserves a special corner for just what makes them happy. Be that a favorite chair in a corner that has a window for daydreaming or a collapsible table set up in a rarely used area for creating your art.

While following your bliss you will require space for setting up a work area, be that one that you clean up projects as they are completed or just have a space you can go and relax and unwind.   Not everyone is blessed with space to grow and flurish, some of us have to get creative in our space usage and find ways to make room not only in our lives but also in our homes for the things that make us happy.

Life without happiness is merely existing and troubles will follow you no matter where you go, but sometimes it is nice to simply escape to our dream world and create where before there was nothing. If you are writing, or painting, or making jewelry. As long as something gives you joy find time in your busy schedule for doing it. Make space in your existing home to follow your bliss.

I hope my blog today has given everyone something to think about. Hopefully a space to call their own and make into their creative space. A place you can sit down, take off your shoes and feel at home.  We all have things we have to get done in our lives. We all have things that need to get done in order to keep our lives running smoothly. But if you do not take time out of your busy lives to enjoy life you are merely existing and waiting for the time that you can be happy and for some those days never come.

If it is not one thing it will be another and when will you make time to follow your bliss?  When will be the right time to put yourself first and do what you are passionate about?  What if you didn't have next week or next year or even 10 more years on this planet. Do you really want to go to your grave knowing that you had all that untapped potential but never took the time to explore it or nurture it.  Your creations don't have to monetary value. They don't have to ever be seen by or shared with the world. They are something you do for yourself to make yourself happy.  They are creations of your inner soul that are meant to be done simply for the joy of doing them.

I have seen entirely to many people who make such great plans for when they retire, they are going to travel the world, or start that garden they dreamed of, or even start designing their own clothing because they have always loved to sew and design things that made them happy. Instead of pursuing those dreams while they can their lives were cut short and their ideas were lost in their death.  Never pass up the opportunity to grow and thrive and be happy. Never put off until tomorrow what you can begin today. If it takes you years to complete that first painting, or you only wear the jewelry you create while doing housework, at least you took steps towards finding your own bliss.

When we are children we find great joy in making things to share with those we love. What mother doesn't have a box filled with pictures painted by their children. Even if you have squint and turn the picture this way and that and try hard to remember what they said it was. Why should that joy only be limited to the very young or the very old.  Where does your creative joy lie?  What makes you happy to do just because you can?  What would you do if you had all the time in the world?

I have often watched scifi movies about people who live forever and wonder what did they do with all those centuries of life.  You rarely see one who became a great painter, or composed music that moved the souls of others.  Most of the time they are running around sucking the life out of others and simply existing.  If you had centuries to live what skills would you perfect?  If you were promised 100 years of life what would you leave behind as your legacy?

Never wait until tomorrow to follow your bliss. No one is promised tomorrow. Yesterday is past, tomorrow is the future, today is the present so enjoy the gift you have been given.  Do what makes you happy in the time you have been given.  There is no guarantee how many tomorrows we may enjoy.

Until tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and stay happy.