Showing posts with label holidays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label holidays. Show all posts

Monday, December 31, 2012

New Years Resolutions and finding your bliss

Many times we make promises to ourselves and others during the New Years celebration, some may be not to drink so much in the coming year or lose that pesky 5 lbs that has been haunting us for the last decade. Perhaps it is to stop smoking or take better care of bodies. But the majority of people do not stick with their New Years Resolutions. They usually last a week at best and then we are right back to square one.  Doing the same destructive behavior we promised to give up just because we were changing our annual calenders on a wall.

When you make a commitment to finding your bliss you may find your internal demons fighting with each other. One may be telling the other that this is a waste of time, you never finish anything, you never accomplish your goals, you never do what you say you are going to do (at least if it for yourself).  Don't listen to them.  This is just your past trying to influence your present and your future.

Finding your bliss isn't going to happen over night. It isn't going to magically appear on your horizon because you want it to.  It is a journey of self discovery and of finding out more about yourself.  I was once told by a very wise grandmother that you cannot truly love someone else if you do not love yourself first.  I have taken her advice to heart.

Women often lose their own identity in the process of supporting a spouse or raising children.  We often times forget what really makes us happy between carpooling to the Soccer matches or making sure that our husbands suits get picked up at the cleaners.  I ask that for this coming year instead of making New Years resolutions you enter into a contract with yourself.  That you will take the time to do something, anything no matter how small that brings a smile to your face and laughter to your lips at least once a week. Be that making time to have coffee with that friend you have all but lost touch with, or spending that extra 10 minutes in the bathtub or shower just because it feels good.

Do something for yourself in the coming year, don't make promises that you probably won't even remember 6 months from now. Take your own happiness as seriously as you take the well being of those around you.  Learn how to take personal time, be that 10 minutes or 24 hours and just do what makes you happy.  Turn the ringer off on your phone or screen your calls and only allow those who support your dreams and goals.  Surround yourself with positive people who will understand your desire to be a better,  happier person.

Don't allow those voices in your head to dictate how you will live your life.  Tell them if they don't have anything helpful to add to the conversation to shut the hell up.  Make sure that in the coming year you make yourself a priority in your life.  If you have always dreamed of painting and really enjoy the feel of brush in your hand and canvas covered in paint, do something to make that a reality.  Start watching videos on painting, invest in yourself and your own well being to buy a handful of paints and a couple of quality brushes and some canvases.

We all have strive, we all have bills, and yes we all have doubts. But until you take a stand and say this is my life and I am going to be happy, nothing will ever change.  If you find yourself sitting in a room thinking about how miserable your life it then it is time for a change.  If you count the moments until you can fall back into bed and put just another day in your journal, then it is time for change.

If you cannot find a great reason to climb out of bed then it is time you found something that makes you happy.  Volunteer your time to help others, start doing something for yourself, find something anything that makes you happy.  Life is way to short to be miserable and you really don't want to wake up 20 years from now filled with shoulda woulda coulda.  It is much better to look back on the things we try and say OK I did that and well it wasn't fun so I didn't do it again. Or better yet I tried that once wasn't that great but what the heck lets try it again just to make sure.

I would much rather go to my grave knowing that I lived a life filled with new experiences and joy than one filled with missed opportunities.  Take that chance, feel that emotion, learn to dance in the rain.  Embrace life because once it is over it is over, there is no do over. There is no second chance at happiness. Once a moment is passed that is a moment lost that can never be recaptured.  If you try something that has always intrigued you and it doesn't make you happy you can check that off your list or even say OK I tried it didn't like it so not something for my life right now.

Now I am not advising anyone to run out and do something stupid or dangerous. But if every morning you rise and have the same old cup of coffee with the same old creamier. Take a walk on the wild side, try a new blend or better yet try a different drink. Life becomes mundane all to quickly and we all fall into those ruts we struggle to climb out of it, be that with our clothes, our hair, our jobs, our marriages, or even our life choices.

In the coming year open yourself up to new experiences, learn to take some chances.  Don't let another year slip by while you tell yourself some day I will (fill in the blank).  Take active steps to make that dream a reality, do something even if it baby steps to bringing that dream into your reality.

Until next time my friends, stay safe, stay sane and most of all enjoy your life.

Brandy is a foster in our home and with our Rescue she has learned the secret to being happy just enjoy life as it comes and never miss an opportunity to smile.

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Christmas Day in the Akes Household

Today is Christmas, it didn't snow but it did get cold.  My hands and feet are numb from being outside.  Today we got up and made sure that everyone had fresh water not frozen, extra food to keep them warm and special treats to let them know how grateful that we are that they share our lives.  Lucky our 30+ year old mustang got extra corn and some sweet red apples, our bunnies got sweet corn and lots of hay to bed down in to chase away the winter cold.  All of our dogs (3 personal, 6 fosters and one boarder) got a special treat last night along with goodies today.  Even my pet rat got a Holiday gift today, she got the gift of companionship with a new friend of the same gender and a special treat of Pear and Sweet corn.

I may be odd but to me my pets and animals are as much family as the children I gave life to.  I count them amongst my blessings every day.  When my life has been its darkest they have shown me unconditional love and reminded me of the things that are important in life.  They have forced me to get up and move even when I would have been content to hide under my blankets and not think of anyone but myself.

Today on this truly blessed holiday I remember the reason for the season, to me that is family.  Those with 2 legs and those with 4.  I am surrounded by those who love me and care for me and this is another reason I am on my quest to find my bliss.  In order to be the best me I can for them I need to find what makes me happy and pursue it.  I need to chase my own dreams and goals and make myself feel complete.

No one can make you happy, that is something entirely up to you. And no one can truly take away away your happiness without your permission.  I have had some in my life would question my life choices, or even tell me I was wrong. At times I hear that voice in the back of my head going "Have you lost your Mind". When in reality I know this is only my own insecurities over my own capabilities and skills.

Today I am spending quality time with some of those I love, treating myself to the extra little things I normally deny myself and just enjoying the holiday.  I am getting ready to go out and have Chinese for Lunch at one of my favorite restaurants, thankfully they are open on the holiday.  I am screening my calls and not accepting calls from those who depress me or bring me down.  And I am taking that little extra time to make myself happy.

I know most will say you have to take those calls they are people who want to wish you a Merry Christmas, but truth of the matter is. My gift to myself today is to be happy and I refuse to allow those who would make any other emotion run rampad in my soul and my heart interfere with my game plan of having the happiest Holiday possible.

Some may call that selfish, I call it taking care of myself first. They are welcome to leave a voice mail or call me tomorrow. Today I am making sure that I am happy that is my primary concern. As women we are brought up to believe that we have to sacrifice our own happiness in order to make sure others are happy. I don't know if it is old age kicking into hyper drive, or just my midlife crisis taking over my mind and body. But today I am doing what I need to do to ensure my own personal happiness and instead of answering the phone and either being rude or being unkind I choose to ignore folks and just have a great day.

Surrounding myself with the things I enjoy and the people that matter most to me.  Another helpful tip on finding your bliss. Don't allow the actions of others to interfere with your plans on being happy.  Most days I will muddle through and find a way to be patient and tolerant but every now and again I have to take what I like to call a personal day.  That is when I do what I want, figuring unless someone is bleeding to death or the world is ending it will wait an additional day.  No harm no foul.

Well off to get ready for lunch. Hope everyone is having a wonderful day and remember to take care of yourself.  If you don't who will and if you aren't operating at your absolute best capacity you are only cheating those in your life who count on you.  Who knows I may splurge later and actually sink back into a hot tub or enjoy a glass of homemade blackberry wine.  You just never know with me.

Hope this post finds all well and happy on this Blessed Christmas Day and I am off to enjoy my personal day.