Minor setbacks and Major accomplishments

Sometimes live gives you lemons.  What you do with those lemons is really up to you.  You can wallow in self pity and say "Woe is me" or you can pick yourself up and dust yourself off and move forward with your dreams and goals.  I never promised you a rose garden but I did promise you that if you take the time to follow your bliss your life will be a life well lived.

I have been wallowing in self pity.  It seamed that everywhere I looked all I saw was failure.  I was unhappy with the way my education was going, I was unhappy with how my finances were going. I couldn't afford the photo equipment I wanted and to be completely honest some times I just felt like I was beating my head against a brick wall.

First one thing and then another pushed me back first a step then two until I came to the realization that the only thing that was holding me back was me. I was allowing these minor setbacks to dictate how I would feel and how I would live my life.  So I did what I always tell others to do when all else fails, try something different.

First my funding for my education has been revamped and it looks like I won't be graduating when I planned.  But is that stopping me no.  I refuse to allow something as minor as funds stop me from becoming what I am destined to be.  So I picked myself up dusted myself off and said OK the traditional way of doing this isn't going to work for me what else can I do to get where I want to be. 

I contacted my school and discussed testing out of some of my classes with them. It is not only doable it is cheaper than the credit hours I need to finish my degree.  I also learned I can continue my education independently.  I can take classes at my local community college and apply those credit hours as I can afford them to my long term goal of having my masters degree in accounting.

I learned that some colleges will even let you write essays and papers regarding your life experiences in order to skip classes and qualify for what is commonly called amongst the secondary schools as life credits.  That was a huge relief off my shoulders.

Now for my photography.  Well money is tight, I have some previous medical bills, my darling husband is getting ready to go under the knife and unfortunately our insurance doesn't cover 100% of our medical expenses.  Yet another set back at least financially, so I came up with alternative ways to earn the equipment I want to invest in photo equipment and creative ways to earn some extra cash not only to help pay for our increasing medical bills but to also help carve the path I choose to follow for my bliss which includes photography.  I also discovered a lot of the fancy equipment can be made out things as simple as a car window reflector instead of a light bouncing board, and something as simple as a sheet mounted to the ceiling with thumb tacks works great as a simple backdrop for doing portraits.

In the meantime though I am doing freelance writing and that is going to pay for those wonderful toys that I day dream about, and that cannot be made at home from simple materials.  I have already paid for a macro tube and a remote trigger for my camera using the credits I earned doing reviews of products I use and liked.

I also learned I can sell my photos online and make a little mad money.  It isn't instant cash but it is a doable source of income for my creative outlet and it gives me a chance to share some of my photos with the world at large. I am no longer content to simply share my photos on facebook and other networking sites. I want to sell my art work to those who may lack the imagination or ability to do their own.

I guess what I am trying to get at in this blog is if you want something bad enough regardless what mountains may stand in your way use your brain to figure out how to make it happen.  Don't give up just because it isn't easy. Nothing in life worth having is simple or easy. Things don't come to those who dream about them, they come to those who get out there bust their butts and make it happen.  Don't wait for destiny to come to you. Go out grab her by the ears and say "listen here, this is going to happen you can either help or get out of my way, because either way its going to happen". 

I have wallowed in self pity long enough. I have pissed and moaned about how sucky my life is right now and you know what I am over it.  I am tired of being a victim of circumstance. I am tired of things I have no control over ruling my world.  I am tired of being sad and depressed and beaten down by the life I have been given. It is time for me to stand up and say "My Turn". 

Regardless what mountains or speedbumps may lie in my path, I am going to do what makes me happy.  If those in my life cannot get on board then they can be left in my wake.  I am not hurting anyone with my bliss I am not taking valuable time away from things that need doing.  I am simply making the investment in my own happiness to chase my own dreams and live my own life.  It aint perfect and I really didn't expect it to be.  But I am keeping it real and that is the whole purpose for this blog.

Sharing my ups and downs and hopefully inspiring others to chase those dreams they dare to dream.  The world is filled with a wide variety of people. We all have gifts and talents that we are born with, and if your talents take you on a path you might not have envisioned for yourself all the better.  Stepping outside your comfort zone is good for you. It helps build character and it helps you discover who you truly are.

So if I have to impart a single piece of advise to you at this junction, it would be this.  Be who you truly are.  Not who you think you should be, not who you family and friends want you to, but who you truly are. Those who truly love you will accept who you are and those who don't well you don't need that kind of negative energy in your life anyway.

Until next time blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and be happy.

When I first took this shot I didn't post it or share it because to me it wasn't good enough but the longer this sat in my photo folder and I saw it every time I scrolled through to look at new shots I thought to myself, it is a very simple shot but it isn't spectacular.  Sometimes things in life aren't going to be spectacular. Sometimes simple things can bring you the most joy because they aren't complicated or high tech. Sometimes we have to say to ourselves it isn't good enough by who's standards?  I think this is a beautiful shot. It is Mother Nature at her finest. It isn't an exotic flower or an incredible rose but it is still beautiful in its simplicity.  It is what life is all about. Thriving where you are planted and learning to overcome what may prevent you from thriving. It is the nature of the beast, it is life in its simplest form.  Have you ever tried to kill a weed?  You pluck it and you poison it and you mow it down. Some people even try burning them out and yet they keep coming back.  Be like that weed, no matter what gets thrown at you remember if a simple life form such as a weed can come back from everything life throws at it, why can't you?

Blissful journeys of self discovery

I have been trying to balance my extremely busy educational life with my family life and my work life along with following my bliss.  At times I often feel as though one or the other is suffering from having to share so much of my attention and so little of my time. I am still learning to balance out what I can do, and what I want to do, and what is actually going to get done.

I am staying current in my class but I often find myself having to stay up late or get up earlier in order to get my assignments completed and turned in before my deadlines.  I do what I can as I can taking time off from work as needed but then feel this overwhelming guilt that I am not getting as much accomplished as I would like to due to my time constraints.

It is spring finally in Tennessee.  Which means I am running around like a chicken with its head cut off trying to make sure all the plants I have cared for and watched over during the winter months have what they need and are getting the nutrients and water they need to survive and thrive, which is rather stressful but a necessary evil for raising your own plants. Although the weather has finally broken and I can finally get them into their containers and allow Mother Nature to start helping out.  She can at least water them and by providing the best soil possible they can feed themselves and grow into the plants I have dreamed of.

My house is not getting cleaned as often as I would like but only because on my list of priorities it ranks rather low.  I get it done just not every week and often times when I am expecting company or the dog hair and dander start to cause me health issues.  But this is not something I am stressing over or something that I am losing sleep over.  I have always felt a tidy home is a sign of a lack of interest.  No offense to those who are obsessed with keeping a spotless home, but since mine serves many purposes and I live with a man who dusting is a dirty word.  (In other words I don't enter his man zone area) I often feel like I am trying to wash my car in the rain.

I am playing with my new camera and digital darkroom every chance I get, often making small breaks in my day to capture a beautiful butterfly on film or just taking shots of my amazing surroundings to capture that particular sunny day or incredible site.  I am also learning about all the different ways to utilize my gadget and mastering the art of digital darkroom usage. 

I am also working towards my accreditation with my collegian honor society.  In hopes of furthering my goals of becoming a well employed bookkeeping or accounting professional.  Working towards cleaning up my online presence as well as creating my professional portfolio and updating my networking skills in order to have a foot in the door with the right folks after graduation.  It is a very busy year in my life and one that is going by way to fast.

I have created a website for my photography.  I am enjoying it so much I don't want to miss a single opportunity to grow and learn and hopefully take additional photos to add to my growing collection.  I have had a lot of positive feedback for the photos I have shared and look forward to more recognition for this hobby that brings me so much joy. If you would like to check out my new website for it I will post a link in this blog.

My New Photography Portfolio

Today I watched an incredible speaker with my Honor society, it was by Peter Bregman he is the author of a book entitled 18 minute Find your Focus it is about doing what you are passionate about and following your bliss in business. How many of us get bogged down in the details of living and forget how to live.  How we need to prioritize what is truly important to us so those things get done and if we are going against the grain we will never succeed.

So many things in my life right now are pointing me in a new direction with my life.  I really thought when I began this journey that I had it all pretty much figured out.  Little did I realize that sometimes about the time you think you have found your niche something happens that shakes your world to the core and makes you take a long hard look at what you really want or what would truly make you happy.

I am unsure if this has happened because I am for the first time in my life actually stopping and taking the time to examine my own happiness and what I need to do in order to find my bliss. Or if this is happening because I opened the door to my bliss and decided that I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.  Since my fathers death I have been making some pretty major changes in my life that have been snowballing.  First it was eliminating commercial skin products from  my life. Figured I would start small and go from there. Then it was the food we were eating and the things we were putting into our bodies.

I lost my dad to a rare form of cancer and my eyes were opened to the fact that toxins are all around us but most people either don't want to see or refuse to acknowledge their presence.  And now I am taking the huge leap to stop smoking. That has been a long time battle for me and they say you don't truly stop until you are ready to make the change. I am ready to make the change.  I am getting wiser and healthier with each passing day.

No I am not going to turn this blog into a statement about how our foods are killing our nation. This blog is about my bliss and how my live is evolving into what I really want out of life.  I was simply bringing you up to speed on how things are progressing and the changes being made in my real life. 

I am writing this blog not only to share my journey with others but also to keep a record of my journey for looking back at later.  To better gauge how I was successful and where I failed in my attempts to create the life I want to live.  I am finding myself reading more these days, on a very wide variety of subjects I never would have thought about reading before as well as revisiting many of my old favorites.

I am also learning about my own limitations and strengths.  I am learning ways to overcome what I see as my weaknesses and how to encourage my strengths to compensate for those weaknesses.  It has been an interesting journey to say the least and I can honestly say I am the better for having begun it.

I am not really sure where this blog was headed, I just felt the need to do some writing. Maybe the rainy weather has made me want to escape into my mind since I cannot escape into my garden and yard.  I am unsure but hopefully reading about my journey and the progress and rather unexpected turns and twist it is taking will encourage others to begin their own. You never know where a path will lead until you begin to follow it.  Pursing my own personal bliss has left me feeling a little bit overwhelmed from time to time but at the same time I am filled with a renewed sense of hope and happiness.  It has given me an outlet for my creative nature while helping me keep my feet firmly planted in Mother Earth.  It has given me a chance to grow and stretch and try my wings in a wide variety of things that before my journey began I was unsure would be a good fit for me.

I hope that your journey does the same thing. That is opens a world of possibilities that may as close as your own front yard.  That is motivates others to find what makes them happy and pursue those things and who knows along the way you just might learn something about yourself and your world at large.

Until next time blog buddies. Stay safe, stay sane and be happy.

When you Finally get what you want

Today my camera arrived. The one I have been dreaming off, drooling over and researching to no end. I know I have driven those around me crazy with "here watch this video" or "ohhh they have the same camera only cheaper I could afford to get the better lens for it."  I have researched many different cameras on the market. Making a list of what I wanted and what I needed and what would be nice to have. I set a budget for what I was comfortable spending and began saving for it.

I have had a few setbacks along the way, unexpected medical bills that hit us out of nowhere and we needed my preciously hoarded funds to meet them. Necessity overruling wanting.  I also knew that there is a time and season for everything and that I needed to wait until the right moment to make my investment to get the most bang for my buck.  Because I didn't run out and buy the first camera to catch my eye when it caught my attention I was able to learn all I could about the the camera I decided on.

Now comes the fun part, learning how to use it and taking all the incredible shots I have been dreaming of.  Now I have had a perfectly functional point and shoot that I paid 100 dollars for on clearance that did what I needed it to do.  It took pictures of the important moments in our lives.  But many times I spent hours working in a digital darkroom cropping, lightening and trying to save those truly important moments in the absolute best framing possible.

I do not regret waiting almost 6 months to make this investment and the test I went through I think made me appreciate it all the more. Sometimes our bliss doesn't happen overnight. Sometimes we have to work and struggle and fight for what we want out of this life. Sometimes just about when we are about to give up hope something will happen and our bliss will magically appear in our hands or in our lives.

Right now is a really busy time in my life.  I am raising chicks to add to our home flock of laying hens, as well as 5 ducklings.  I am planting like crazy because it turns out there is a shortage of individuals who can raise a plant from a seed and I actually found someone who will purchase my surplus plants to help support my other passions, my animals.

I am also back in college finishing up my degree and struggling with scheduling because some days there just isn't enough hours in the day for all the things I want or need to get done.  I have also been sick and actually had to take a sick day which for me is very rare, but sometimes you body says OK we aren't going to fight this if you keep pushing us the breaking point.

But all in all I can honestly say I am closer than I have ever been to my bliss.  I am getting there one small step at a time.  I am still fighting the good fight for the dogs I love.  Recently our state decided that they were going to try and pass some legislation that created issues for those who have a particular type of dog.  I was right there in the foxholes fighting along side those who love these dogs and refuse to allow them to legislated into extinction in our state.

I have waiting and planned and dreamed of things that are still outside my reach but with each passing day they get closer because I truly want them bad enough to make it happen.  I don't rest on my past victories I take note of them and press forward, ever learning and evolving into the creature I was born to be.

I have had some failures and setbacks, yes.  But all in all I have found that if I am persistent enough and patient enough that with time all that I want will come to me, just sometimes I have to work a little harder at obtaining them. If they do not come to me when I want them there is more often than not a reason. Perhaps I am not ready to experience that happiness, or maybe I wouldn't appreciate them the way I will a few more months down the line. I guess what I am trying to say is don't give up.

Just because your bliss isn't falling into your lap doesn't mean with time and dedication it won't. Sometimes you just gotta fight a little harder. You gotta try a little more creatively, or you have to want it bad enough.  Sometimes thing fall into place when you least expect them to or things fall apart when you least expect them to.  I have learned that during this journey first hand.  But just because something does work out this time or every time you have tried it in the past doesn't mean it won't. It just means the universe is testing to see how badly you truly want it.

I know everyone finds their bliss in different ways. For some it might be a goal of having enough money to never stress over bills again. For another it may be to lose those stubborn 10 lbs that you just cannot seam to shed. For some it is simple things like enjoying a cup of coffee with a loved one while sitting on an old porch watching a beautiful sunset together. Every individual has their own dreams and ideals and no one should ever knock another persons dreams or goals.  Who are they to say what is worthy of being a dream and what is worthy of someone else's time and attention.

So today I leave you with this thought.  If you could do anything on this planet and it would make you blissfully happy, what would that be?  Why aren't you taking active steps to make that a reality?  Even if it is nothing more than in the planning stage. Trying to figure out what needs to happen in order to bring that dream into your reality.  Never give up and never give in when it comes to your dreams.  Only you can say what is truly worth the effort you put forth to make them your reality.

Until next time blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane and be happy.

One of the incredible shots taken with my new camera. Beauty is all around you if you will only take the time to look and appreciate it.  I have been dying to capture some photographs of our peach tree in bloom. I finally am getting the chance to do that.  I am amazed at nature in all her wonder that even when the temperatures here are in the 20's she still finds a way to struggle through and show her beauty to those willing to look.