How will I recognize my Bliss

Sometimes we follow a path hoping it will take us where we want to go in life.  We trudge along waiting for that life changing experience that will make us happy.  We think if we get the job of our dreams that it will change or life for the better.  If we make upper management and get that corner office that the world will be our oyster.  That if we marry the person of our dreams and plan a life together that our mission in life will be complete and we will finally be happy.

These are all temporary situations that fate, time and destiny can steal away from us.  In the downturn of the economy many jobs have become redundant, many upper managements positions have become outdated, and many times that perfect person is human and we discover years down the line that they have either become a stranger to us or they have evolved into someone we no longer recognize.  You cannot base your bliss on aspects of your life that could dissolve before your very eyes.

Your home can be lost in a fire or natural disaster, you marriage could dissolve due to miscommunications or even bad life choices.  All of these things can change and be gone like smoke on the wind. You bliss however cannot, it is not a physical state or material positions.  You bliss is where you find happiness and how you get through tough times.

Many people find solace in religion, they follow a set list of rules that at some point they felt applied to their lives.  As their lives change their faith in those in rules may become stronger or it may be threatened.  I think that those who are able to cling to those beliefs without fear or doubt are blessed.  They always have their religious affiliations to find solace in and hopefully they also find bliss in that life choice.  As long as they aren't trying to penalize others for believing differently than they, do no harm no foul.

Finding your bliss also means respecting others enough to allow them the same freedoms you have found in your own life.  It doesn't mean trying to convince others that you path is the only path or treating them as though they are incapable of making their own life choices.  There is no harm in praying for others, or lighting candles or sending positive healing energy their direction as long as it doesn't interfere with their own free will.  It means respecting others and treating them as you yourself would want to be treated, even if others are at that state in their development.  It is a state of mind regarding what makes you happy and having the freedom to pursue those dreams and goals. Regardless of what others may think of those goals and dreams.  It means finding out what works for you and applying that knowledge to your own personal life.

Sometimes finding your bliss can be complicated, sometimes it can be just out of your reach but in your gut you know it is there.  Sometimes it comes in unusual ways or due to unforeseen circumstances.  It doesn't happen because you wake up one morning and say I am going to be happy dammit.  It comes because you open up your heart and your mind to the possibility of it.  It happens when you least expect it and when you have dreamed of it for years.  It is nothing and everything all rolled up in a ball of cotten candy and tied with a red velvet ribbon. It is what happens when you are busy living your life.

Sometimes your bliss may be standing right in front of you but if you are ready to accept it, it will remain a mystery to you.  Many times I have passed by things that could have made me happy but due to the circumstance I was currently living I refused to acknowledge their presence.  I was so busy keeping my eye on the long term goals I had in my minds eye that I was blind to things staring me right in the face.  Finding your bliss means opening your eyes and finding happiness where ever it may be.  It means being able to find joy in the little things in life and being able to welcome new experiences for a chance of growth and enlightenment.

Finding your bliss means that if given the chance to have a new experience you don't turn away and ignore it, you weigh the pros and cons in your life to see if it is something that might be a new life altering experience.  It means even if you have never had an interest in something not taking a chance to see if perhaps there might be something there to in some way make your life a little bit better. Maybe not by the actual project but by the new friends you make along the way.

Many times I have attended a class I might not have had an interest in but went anyway, just to be able to say OK I tried that, wasn't my cup of tea but most of the people I met were amazing. They were following their own bliss and having new experiences by doing so.  I am not saying that you have to run out and sign up for every low cost or free class out there. Pick and choose what things you would like to know more about or things that might prove to help you find your bliss. Be that cooking or wine making, or painting or whatever.  I may have no skills in that particular area and I might truly suck at it, but if it makes me happy and makes my life better than it is time well spent.  If it turns out to be something that brings me no happiness or in any way make my life better then I try to take a look around me at those in the class. We all have similar interest in one way or another.  It might not be our passion but it might be a similar interest in our families, life goals, or even just saving money or living healthier.  You just never know until you take the leap and try something different.

Will every path you take lead you to where you want to go?  No, but every path you take, every mistake you make along the way will help you learn more about yourself until you know who you truly are inside and out.  I like to remind my darling husband that had I not dated before we met I would not have firmly planted in my head what I will and will not accept in a relationship.  All that time I spent dating those who didn't fit into my ideal helped me see first hand exactly what I wanted and in the process learned where my own boundaries lay.  I do not regret the mistakes of my past because they helped me become the person I was meant to be.

There is only a waste of your energy and your time if you do not learn something from the experience.  I like to believe that everything happens for a reason.  That often times road blocks and speed bumps come up to test my determination to make my dreams a reality.  That without them I wouldn't truly appreciate the end result when I get there nor would I recognize bliss when I am nose to nose with it.

Yes some rain does fall into my life on occasion, yes I do wake up some days and go really, another day this side of the dirt blanket, I don't wanna.  I am not a happy person by nature, believe it or not.  But every day I get up, face whatever the day is going to throw at me, try hard to find the happiness in the whole experience, not simply the moments and get one small step closer to the things I enjoy and I create the life I want one very small baby step at a time.

I have those days when nothing goes right.  My coffee has grounds in it.  I slip in the mud while walking my dog in the cold rain and bust my butt and cover myself in the mud.  But when those kind of days hit I may sit in that cold mud with the rain hitting me in the face and just for a  moment try to be thankful for what went right.  I woke up, there is a major accomplishment.  I am at an age when it isn't uncommon for those I have known my entire life to pass in their sleep.  I have had many friends who didn't make it to the age I have.  I am sitting on the hard ground covered in mud and I am thankful for the mud, it is said to do wonderful things for your skin.  I can feel the stinging rain on my face which means that I can still feel things even if they aren't the most blissful feelings in the world.  I am thankful for all the blessings in my life large and small alike.  I do not delineate between large and small blessings. Blessings are blessings regardless of their size.

Finding your happiness is a state of mind, it isn't being the most beautiful, or talented, it isn't being the richest or the most famous.  It is being happy no matter what gets thrown in your path.  It is learning to embrace those difficult times and making them your own.  It means the ability to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and continue on.  It means having the state of mind that it will all work out in the end and that nothing happens without a reason.

Sometimes we won't recognize our bliss even when it is standing in front of us.  It will be a stranger to us because we have not opened our eyes and our hearts to the wonderful possibilities that lay in front of us.  It is like searching your entire life for the perfect partner only to realize that they have been standing by your side all along but you were to blind or to focused to realize the true potential they have in your life to make it all the better.

In order to find your true bliss you must be willing to look at life as it really is.  You take off those rose colored glasses to discover that although the world isn't a rose garden it does have many aspects in that can and do make us happy when we allow them to.  It is about learning to live in the moment while still holding firm to those long term goals.  It means finding happiness where you can find it no matter how big or how small and living in that moment. Learning to stop and smell the roses even when you cannot afford to buy the flowers.

I hope my blog today has given you some food for thought. I hope that you take a moment in your day to look around you and truly enjoy the beauty that surrounds us all but many are so oblivious to that we are blind to them.  It doesn't cost anything to stop and look around, and the world isn't going to end if you are two minutes behind schedule because you took the time to stop and admire the clouds or smell that beautiful flower, or just compliment a complete stranger on how good they smell or how pretty the look today.  I have also found that random acts of kindness make me feel better.  Buying a strangers coffee or complimenting a complete stranger just because I can. But I am odd like that.

Until Tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and be happy.

Some people would see a cold winter day, an old wheel-barrel turned on its belly and the cold ice dripping off it.  A gardener in hiatus if you will. I see something completely different.  I see the beautiful patterns the ice has created on the barrel.  I see the possibility of my future garden.  I see in my minds eye hours of happiness spent digging in the dirt and creating food where before it was only a seed and dirt.  I see my bliss.  Sometimes the most mundane things in life can bring you the most happiness.  It is all a matter of perspective.

Why should I follow my Bliss?

It is often said that happy people live longer. They seam to have an inner glow about them that radiates out those around them.  They move with a purpose through life and seek out others with similar interest and similar goals.  They motivate others to find their own inner happiness.  Be that a job they love, a partner who is their equal or even just following a dream to accomplish something in this world that is bigger than themselves.

They don't wallow around in self pity and say woo is me and they don't wait for a diagnosis of dying in order to start living.  People who follow their bliss don't ask those questions like "why are we here", or "what does it all mean" because they already have those answers.  Why are we all here and what does it all mean is simple.  We were created to live a life well lived. If that means becoming the great artist that in our souls we already know we are, or if that means simply doing something you are really passionate about at every given opportunity.

I have read that you shouldn't follow your bliss, that it is a unrealistic dream set in place by those who want to lead you down the yellow brick road. That is it an unattainable state of mind that in reality only leaves you broken and destroyed because so few actually get to that place in their lives where they are doing what truly makes them happy and often times once they obtain it they learn it wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

I say that those who do not support your decision to be happy are so miserable in their own lives they are threatened by your determination to be happy.  Misery loves company and why should you be happy when they cannot or will not find a way to be happy themselves. Many people are content to merely exist instead of taking the bull by the horns and doing something to make their lives better.

If you are in the self examination phase of finding your bliss, or taking baby steps to make it a reality, or even just exploring options regarding things you have wanted to try but have never done so for a wide variety of reasons, there will always be haters.  There will be those folks who believe that life is about hard work and dedication. About following the rules and doing what you are told. Never bumping the system or even questioning the rules.  There are more haters than there are supporters of your dreams.

Sometimes haters can become supporters with time and patience on your part. Sometimes they cannot, they simply cannot put their own ideals aside long enough to see the forest for the trees.  They feel that although others have found their bliss and are living a life they truly enjoy that you will always be amongst the number of folks who don't.

When I decided about a decade ago to get my CDL's my loving father whom I adored and trusted had a running bet with my husband at the time that I would not finish school much less get my CDL's.  I spent 3 months 5 days a week going to school to learn to drive a tractor trailer.  I worked a full time job after school to support my family while attending school, and for every snide remark and every doubt they voiced it simply made me more determined to get license and more determined to do well.  My loving father lost his bet and in the end actually said he was proud of me for following my own path and doing what made me happy.  After that he learned if I wanted something bad enough it didn't matter what mountain I had to move to make it happen, even if I had to do it at a teaspoon every trip I would make it happen.  His doubt in me made me into a stronger person by letting me learn my own strengths and his sarcasm actually gave me the determination to make my dreams a reality.

I do not drive a truck anymore.  I have actually retired my commercial drivers license but it in no way was because of his thoughts regarding female truck drivers or his doubts in my ability to drive.  I drove a truck for 5 years, got myself out of debt and got out of a marriage that didn't make me happy.  I have always been a rebel of sorts, doing what was best for me and my family regardless of having or not having a support system in place regarding the decisions I make and the life choices I choose.

I know that not everyone is that headstrong or determined to live life by their own rules and to follow their own path.  I was simply because I had more at stake than just following my bliss.  I knew if I didn't take action I would never be able to provide my family with the things they needed in order to just survive must less thrive.

Every dream and every goal has a life span. Sometimes those lifespans reach across an entire lifetime, sometimes they are means to an end.  I know that at times you think you will always want something or that your situation will never change, but the only thing that is inevitable in this lifetime is death, taxes, and change.  Things change, people change, and what makes you happy can change.  Don't lock yourself into a dream if that isn't the dream or goal that is in your gut.  You may want something so bad you can taste it but at some time in the future that dream may change or that goal may alter into something else.  Go with the flow.

Many times I have pursued things that I thought would make me happy.  And in the end they didn't live up the reality I had created in my head, that is ok. That is the nature of the beast.  You change, your life changes, your dreams can change as well.  Now if you have always dreamed of painting and you start painting only to discover that you are not as talented as you thought you were, you may have to take a step back and do one of two things. You can either say OK tried that not for me and walk away from it. Or you can practice and practice and then practice some more until it is second nature to you and suddenly your creativity takes over and you find yourself getting better and better.

I often try new things just to challenge myself.  I may not have a burning desire in my gut to make something a reality but a mild curiosity to see where it will lead me.  I am always trying to learn new skills and learn new things. I enjoy the whole learning process. Going from the have no clue to I have heard of that and it didn't work for me phase.  I felt that way about school and probably why my major has changed 3 times during my academic career.  But the truth of the matter is I am a better person for trying on all three hats until I found one that fit and that I enjoyed wearing.

I began my educational goal of being management so my associates is in administration.  Upon finishing that degree I decided that management wasn't the right path for me so during my bachelors degree I concentrated on electronic communications, which I thoroughly enjoy but the idea of sitting in a room typing out memos or even dealing with the whole communications aspect wasn't a great fit for me.  I finally decided on accounting because I met taxes and fell in love with that field.  I love advising others as to how save money. How to fill out their initial tax forms with their employer to ensure they aren't paying taxes at the end of the year but also to ensure that Uncle Sam isn't getting to play with their money.  I just enjoy helping others. I also adore the financial aspect of it. Numbers to me always make sense, be that a spread sheet, a balance sheet or just keeping books for a company or private individual. 

I find myself in my spare time creating excel graphics to help my darling husband understand where we need to trim our household budget or why we cannot afford to buy that expensive toy he has been drooling over.  I like numbers, I also enjoy writing and creating art with my camera.  I am a very multi dimensional person.  I doubt I will ever make a living at taking pictures, but it is something that brings me joy.  I enjoy writing and so I blog, to exercise those muscles. Once upon a time I had a dream of writing books, preferably fiction because I could create the world in which I wanted my characters to live. But I also know that my writing is not good enough to make a living doing that either. Now I might make some extra cash on the side with my camera or even make a check as a freelance writer but I lack the dedication and the passion to make those my career of choice.  Who knows my path may change and I might end up as a photographer or a writer before my journey reaches its end but if not I will still enjoy taxes and bookkeeping.

Life is to short to lock yourself into a role that doesn't fit, and at times we all find ourselves living a life we never envisioned for ourselves. But finding your bliss is about so much more than just loving the job you do or finding your version of paradise on earth.  It is about being happy with the life you live and learning to have that happy place to escape to when the rest of your life gets out of control.  It is about loving yourself enough to make your own happiness a priority and not just working so hard to make others happy in your life.

Finding your bliss is important because when you find your bliss and it changes you are more able to make the adjustments in your life and do what makes you happy instead of staying on a path that no longer works for you.  It is about caring enough about yourself to do what is important to you and for you and to survive the hard times by having those positive memories and positive thoughts already firmly in place and the ability to adapt and survive the tough times.

We all need something that gives us comfort. Some find that comfort in a the bottom of a bottle which down the line causes more issues than it cures.  Some of us find it in a loyal friend (either two or four legged) but those things are fleeting and won't be around always.  Some of us find in our gardens, or in our paintings, or in our photography or even in the love of our significant others.  But many things in life are fleeting whether we realize it or not.  Friends may come and go, partners may change or leave, and things that you once found happiness in may longer bring you the happiness they once did.

Life changes and in order to stay happy you have to learn to change with it.  You have to learn to roll with the punches that life throws and as someone who has followed their bliss it is much easier to adapt and change and follow a path that may be unfamiliar or even foreign to you.  Change isn't easy, and many people cannot adapt.  Did you know that men often die shortly after retiring because suddenly their self value plummets when they are no longer active within the economy.  Many men actually identify their value as human beings with their ability to provide for their families. If they do not cultivate activities and interest to follow after retirement many simply feel that there is no reason to continue on.

Women often go through a mourning period when their last child grows up and moves out. They refer to that as the empty nest syndrome. Suddenly for the first time they have nothing pressing in their lives.  They have spend the majority of their adult lives caring for others and have no clue how to care for themselves.  Change is not easy regardless of your gender, age, ethnic background or cultural differences.  It affects everyone in different ways. Some people it makes mad, others it may make depressed, some it may put you off your food or make you take a long hard look at your life. But the one constant is bliss.

If you can find something that sparks your passion that no matter what is going to be there regardless if for 5 years or 50 it gives you something to channel that energy into, to lose yourself in and to escape to during those changes. It gives you something to focus on so that you aren't sitting around going woo is me.  It will give you a distraction while the dust settles and life continues you.  It will give you a firm foundation that you can build the next chapter of your life on.

You may never "find" your bliss, but finding your bliss isn't about living the perfect life. It is about living a life well lived.  It is about finding purpose and something that motivates you to lead you where you were born to go.  It is about being happy no matter what may changes in your life and learning to accept change as part of life.

With a dream or goal in the works you have that stability to help absorb the pain of change and give you a focus for the life you want to create. It gives you something to fall back on and a sense of peace you wouldn't have without it.  It gives you something to say ok this has gone to hell in a handbasket but it is ok because I still have this.  Be that losing your job, losing your spouse, losing your home, losing a parent, or losing your dog.  It gives you something to be happy about, even when you don't want to be happy at all.

I hope my blog today gives you hope. I hope it helps others realize how important it is to follow your bliss.  That regardless if others feel your dreams or goals are silly or a waste of your time or resources this is something you need to do for yourself.  That without it you will be lost in a sea of despair when those life altering things happen.  Will you ever make a living doing what you love, who knows.  But you will never know if you do not follow your bliss and create a life worth living.

Until tomorrow blog buddies, be safe, be sane and be happy.

Winter is the season when the whole world seems to go to sleep. The weather is cold, the ground is hard, and the trees and plants seem to be dead. Since there is little else to do, it is a time that is conducive to working hard. There isn't much else to do, and the weather else seems to suggest that we must buckle down and do the things that we have been avoiding. This is not a bad thing. It can very satisfying to work hard and be creative. Creativity is part of our makeup. Without a purpose in our lives, depression would quickly set in.

Winter poems

These are not my words but this is my photo taken with my point and shoot camera, taking baby steps towards my goals and dreams make my life worth living.  I am still saving for my dream camera and although some medical and financial issues have taken their toil on my fund I am still hopeful and confidant that when the time is right this too shall be a reality.

Respect yourself enough to follow your bliss

We as a society often judge those who do not make the same kind of decisions regarding their lives that we as individuals deem "normal".  For everyone "normal" is something different. For one person normal may be marrying someone of the opposite gender and having a family.  Being a stay at home Mom and a Dad who provides for the family and a white picket fence and 2.5 children.

For others it may be being with the person of your dreams, choosing not to have a two legged family (aka human children) and living in a uber apartment with fine art and traveling.  For another it may be living your life as a single.  Different strokes for different folks. Just because everyone around you has chosen a particular life style it doesn't mean you have to choose the same life.  You may want something completely different in order to live a life that makes you happy.

I often hear from others that this person is weird or strange because their "norm" is different than another persons "norm".  And as a society we often judge others because they don't conform to what our personal ideals are. This could be a religious difference, a difference in partner choices, or even simply a difference in marital status.  The list is endless.

I am telling you here and now that there is no "Normal".  It is a fallacy created by our society to get you to do whatever the particular group of individuals you hang with wants you to do.  If everyone is getting married and you are standing on the sidelines single and happy. They will often see you as a threat because the world is filled with sheeple.  That is those who cannot or will not think for themselves.  They are often threatened by the lone wolf who follows their own dreams and path in this world.  Not allowing the decisions of others to dictate your actions is a sign of intelligence.  It is also a symptom of independence.

Now if you are happy with the idea of the opposite sex partner and the white picket fence and the 2.5 kids awesome, follow that dream. But if you are not do not do what makes others happy, do what makes you happy.  For every ying there is a yang.  So somewhere out there is probably someone who can relate to your reasons for preferring the child free life, or even embrace you for your differences and not feel the need to judge you simply because you don't conform to their ideal of "normal".

Following your bliss also means making a life you want to live.  It isn't just pursuing the interest that makes you happy.  It is also about choosing your own path in life and embracing what ever that path may hold for you.  Be that a partner of the same gender, a partner of the opposite gender, or even no partner at all.  Life is to short to be miserable.  If people cannot accept you and love you for who you are truly are deep down in your heart then they do not deserve to be amongst those you have within your inner circle.

Life can be hard and at times we all search for that perfect group of individuals to surround ourselves with.  But if you have to pretend to be something you aren't then why are you struggling so hard to be something you are not.  You cannot find happiness if you are living a lie. I have written before on to thy own self be true.  This blog goes hand in hand with that.  We must learn to look within ourselves and see the real us.  The person behind the mask we slap on every morning and tell the world this is me like it or lump it, regardless I am who I am.

This means that you don't have to pretend to be happy if you just aint happy.  That you don't have to pretend to be overjoyed at something when you don't understand it.  You don't have to pretend to be interested in something that is just so incredibly boring to you that you want to take a nap every time the subject matter comes up.  Now this doesn't mean you can be rude and blow off those who don't appreciate the real you, it simply means that you accept that they will never understand completely your life choices and that they may or may not ever come to terms with your life choices and that is ok.  That life will continue on and that the sun will rise tomorrow.

When my children were younger I had a friend who learned his child was gay.  At first he was in shock and disbelief that any product of his loins could be gay.  He went through all the same emotions as a parent who had just lost a child.  Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and then finally acceptance of the fact that his child would never be the image he had in his head of what his child should be.  He even went so far as to say that they would never find happiness because they would never get married or have a family.

It took many years for this individual to come to terms with their child's sexuality.  And I am happy to report that almost a decade later his child is living the life she choose and is now in a committed relationship with another woman and they have a family of their own.  He learned with time and love and that regardless of the life choices his child made, it was still his child.  He learned that at times you won't agree with the choices of those you love but as a caring loving adult you have two choices.  You can either accept them for who they are, or you can run the risk of losing them forever.  He chose to learn to accept that his child was different than the image he had in his head of what he wanted for her as an adult.

If those around you don't support your life choices then it may just be a sign from the universe it is time to enlarge that circle of friends that you surround yourself with.  If they are making choices that you feel the need to try and sway them from or convince them that they are wrong it may just be a sign from the universe that it is time for you to either broaden your own horizons or perhaps just live and let live.

We live in a very straight laced society.  And people are often judged by how they look, or what they drive, or what they do for a living.  Some judge others because they have tattoos or piercings.  Until  you actually get to know someone, really know them, not just that surface hi and bye and you pass in the hallway you don't understand the challenges that they face or the life path that may have had a controlling hand in the choices they have made.  Perhaps to them those tattoos and piercings are an expression of their own individuality.  Perhaps those are markers of milestones of their life.  You don't know until you either ask or they volunteer that information.  You cannot judge others if you do not wish to be judged.

We all have hidden characteristics that we don't share with the general public.  Most of us do not parade around our inner most secrets on display and allow the world to see them, because no one wants to be judged.  But if you are lucky enough to have a few close friends and loved ones who you can be what you are warts and all you are a very lucky person indeed.  Many times people go through their entire lives living a lie.  I have known people who are "weird" by cultural standards but hide it so well to meet them you would never know.  But behind closed doors they let their freaky flags fly high.  Or they are alone and can only do those those freaky things in their head for fear that someone might find out, that they like wearing women's clothing (male friends) or that they like being in control (both male and female). Or that they have some secret fantasy of being a singer in a band or some other slightly off the wall but no less important to them dream.

Terrified of ever following their dreams or pursuing their bliss because of what people might say or think.  I am a very open accepting person.  I know things that would make you go "you are making that up about some folks" but I don't judge and people often feel secure in letting me into those dark corners of their mind and hearts because they know their secrets are safe with me.  I won't judge them or ridicule them because I know we all have a freaky side.  It might be something as simple as a guilty indulgence of  a quart of rocky road icecream and their favorite chick flick on the nights that their husband is far from home when they are health freak the rest of the time.  Or it might be as crazy as they like to dress in drag and compete in some local competition on drag night. I don't care as long as it isn't hurting someone what is the harm in it.

Love those in your life and those who cannot accept you for exactly who you are then limit their exposure to your life. They may in time come to appreciate your differences, in time they may not. Either way their judgement of you will not affect how you feel about yourself unless you let it. No one can control how you feel about yourself unless you let them.  You are in control of your own destiny and only you can choose the path you choose to walk.

You have to live and let live. Learn to embrace differences in others and learn not to judge simply because someone else has a different viewpoint on the world.  As long as their freakyness isn't hurting anyone or anything what is the harm in it.  By being the person you want in your life you will often attract those who won't judge you or try to force you to be something you aren't.  Live your life on your own terms and be true to yourself.  Learn to embrace those differences and learn from them.  In both yourself and others.  The only thing this world is really short on is love.  We create war over religious differences, we cast away people who could help us grow and evolve into the people we were born to be simply because they have a different view of the world.

By learning to accept others we can also learn to accept our own "weird" ways and embrace who we truly are.  We can learn that although we may not be just like our siblings or our friends we are no less important in the over all scheme of things.  The world thrives on diversity.  If it didn't you wouldn't have near as many choices when it comes time to enjoy fine dining.  Just like not everybody appreciates sushi, not everybody appreciates hamburgers or pizza.  We are all different and those differences make us what we are, a unique individual with our qualities and faults and everybody has their own demons to face and conquer.

I hope my blog today gave you some food for thought.  I hope it helped some who are going through hard times to realize that regardless of how "weird" they may feel that in reality we are all a little "weird" from time to time and that is ok.  That no one is going to escape this life without a little turbulence but it isn't the flight that matters, only that we touch down safe and sound and happy at the end of our journey.

Until tomorrow blog buddies, stay safe, stay sane, and be happy.

Finding my bliss on a cold winters day

Today is the day after Christmas, the weather outside is chilly and dreary.  My home is filled with warmth and love but some days it is just really hard to find something that makes you happy. I find during the nasty weather that most things just annoy me or set me on edge.  I also find myself worrying over things I have no control over or cannot change, at least not right at this moment change.

I try to find things to keep my mind and my hands busy. I got in my new Burpee catalog in the mail today.  Going through it reminds me that spring is just around the corner so I begin my seeds for the coming garden.  I spoke with 2 of my girls about the bad weather and began to make plans for the coming weekend, if the weather lifts and we can actually safely get out.

I live in TN which is not known for its bad weather or capable drivers on bad roads.  Most folks around here make a mad dash for the grocery store if the weather man even mentions rain or snow or sleet.  It is frightfully cold and I worry about our animals outside the ones I cannot bring in because if I did it would a Noah's ark in my home. We already have all of the dogs and the cat inside and that is stressful enough.  So I do what I can to ensure that everyone is warm and safe and has extra bedding and food to try and stay as warm as possible during this hopefully short lived cold snap.

I have the cat and the dogs inside so they won't suffer from the cold or possibly get frostbite, but then I find myself stressing over the animals I know are still outside both here and in others homes.  I know that many people including myself have not given much thought to having animals out of doors during bad weather in past years but since I have allowed mine into my home they have become family members and not just yard ornaments.  We always had dogs growing up and we never thought twice about leaving them outside during bad weather. But I was raised in a very different generation than the society I now live in.

All of our animals now are cared for to the best of my abilities. They are ensured regular vet visits and the highest quality food we can afford. They are given holiday gifts at Christmas time and they often sleep in our bed or roam freely through our home at any given time.  I tell people this is their house I just pay the bills.

During cold dreary days I also have entirely to much time to think. I am stuck inside and cannot do anything outside without bundling up like an Eskimo and I am not fond of bundling up.  I am so not a cold weather person.  Am not sure if that is because I am getting older and every rain drop and every snow flurry I feel down in my bones or if that is just something I lack patience with.  I often dream of moving to a tropical island that there is no such thing as snow on.  But then I realize I would miss the turning of the leaves and the budding of the flowers in the spring and resign myself to dealing with an occasional day of bad weather and cold and sleet or snow.

I try to find happiness in watching my dogs play and learn from them. They do not care if it is 102 outside or 32 outside they are just happy to be alive. Playing with exuberance with other pack members even if only earlier they may have been disagreeing over who is going to lay where.  They live in the moment and take joy where they can find it. Be that in a chewie or a bowl of special food, or even in the pure joy of the company of others. Sometimes those are life lessons we could all be better by in remembering.

With the nasty weather and the dreary day don't have much to share today, just wanted to flex those writing muscles and try to remember my blessings and find something that makes me happy. Time to go do some cooking and make the house smell more of fresh bread than wet dog.  Hope all are staying safe during this last of 2012 and hope that all are enjoying the last of the holiday season.

For my first post I would like to introduce myself.  I am an average woman. I was raised in a generation that was taught that others always came first. Growing up I was raised to believe you could not find true happiness unless you found a husband. One that would provide for you and keep you safe and warm for the hard life that lie ahead of you.  When I was growing up women were limited in what they could be. Although I was born into an era of women who burned their bras, and fought for women's liberation and equal pay for equal work this didn't prevent our Mothers from raising us to believe in the happily ever after.

I cut my first teeth on Disney Princesses and the damsel being rescued by the handsome prince. Snow white always got her Prince, and Ariel got her human, and Pocohantus got John Smith (which for the record is not really historically correct).  I watched as time and time again the girls always got their dream boat and lived happily ever after. The movies never showed how they handled having children or if they stayed home or were working Moms.  The movies never showed the handsome prince having a side dish in another kingdom or deciding they weren't cut out for family life. The movies never showed real life and all its hardships.

Now I understand why they never showed real life. Who would want to traumatize a young child into believing that life was hard and relationships were harder.  They wanted us to have happy childhoods and grow up into productive members of society.  The fact that as the children grew up and the husbands either died or divorced that we would be left alone.  That somewhere between the marriage alter and the death bed we would have to discover what made us happy and pursue our own dreams.

That is where I am now. My children are grown with lives of their own.  My husband is so busy with work that I spend a lot of time alone.  I keep myself occupied by volunteering and doing rescue work with animals. I returned to school to get my education but that chapter of my life will be done come the fall of 2013.  I garden, read, write, and try to find happiness in my day to day life but in the last few years I have lost several family members and this along with some other life altering things have made me take a long hard look at my life and decide I have given decades of my time and energy to others. It is time for me to find my own personal bliss and begin building a life I will be proud to someday share stories of with my grandchildren.

As I said I am the average run of the mill woman. I am not especially talented or beautiful.  I do not think I will find the cure for cancer or some other dreaded disease.  I seriously doubt I will ever fly in a space shuttle or walk on the moon.  But in my own small way I want to live a life that is filled with excitement and joy.  I want to find what makes me happy and decide if it is something I would like to spend my free time pursuing.

I already find a lot of joy in writing and gardening and have taken those things about as far as I can.  I have already discovered the joy of seeing an animal once cast off by its owners in a loving home with a family of its own. But it is time for the discovery of myself. Who I really and what makes me the happiest.  This blog will be an online journal of this great adventure and I am hoping that some that read it will become inspired by it and want to find their own bliss.

You don't have to wait until your kids are grown or you wake up one day alone to do this.  You can begin this journey right now with me.  I will post updates and links to thinks that make me go interesting.... Or just things that make me smile and count my many blessings.  This may at times be boring or mundane but at times so are life.  It is just a written record of this great adventure I am embarking on and wanted to invite others to join me and perhaps together we can all learn a little something about ourselves along the way.